


Still Care For You

by sunnyamazing



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, PM Julia Montague
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:48:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 30,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24127651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnyamazing/pseuds/sunnyamazing
Summary: “As you know, P.S. Budd, there are people who do not like me. People who would prefer me to disappear.”Her voice sounds like an accusation, as if he knows better than most what it is like to hate her.David, Julia and the twenty-four hours that change everything, again.
Relationships: David Budd/Julia Montague
Comments: 131
Kudos: 259





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, here we are. I had a dream about David and Julia and I basically made this fic to go with the scene I dreamt.  
> I am determined to finish this one, I have a flow chart of where it is going and everything! But I would always love encouragement. 
> 
> Thanks to my WT for her beta skills and to all of you that listen to my writing rambles on a daily basis, you're all the best.

The power she still holds over him is obvious. He thought he had been able to push it to one side. Out of sight and out of mind. He thought the feelings he once had were shut down and forgotten. But, being in her presence again, it might as well be six months ago.

He knows he shouldn’t be this close to her. He should be keeping his distance and he really shouldn’t be watching her in private moments, when she is unaware that he is near. But the power she has over him has only seemed to grow again. Seeing her earlier today, being close to her and being in danger with her once more, it all seems too familiar. It’s too much like it was before. 

Kim had directed him to keep to the outside perimeter. He doesn’t think she knows his complicated history with the principal. Actually, he’s almost sure she doesn’t, otherwise he doubts he would be here, favour or no favour. He has manned his post for most of the night, only calling to exchange places with Kim ten minutes ago. 

There were only so many times he could lap the small red brick cottage without losing his mind. Kim is doing the rounds now, so he has not abandoned his post. She is still safe and he is still doing his job.

He stands in the hallway, partially obscured by the half open door. He peers into the room, not seeing her immediately. But then his eyes find her and he curses at the flutter of nerves he feels as his body gives an automatic response to catching sight of her. She is barefoot, sitting cross-legged on the sofa as the BBC news plays silently in the background. 

The ticker along the bottom reads:  _ ‘PM safe in unknown location – attacker still at large.’  _

**_Twenty four hours earlier …_ **

She stares at herself in the mirror, taking in her appearance as she scoops a healthy amount of eye cream from the jar in her bathroom cabinet. She sighs as she places the cream under each of her eyes and massages it gently into her skin. The stress of the last six months is perhaps beginning to show. 

She should be happy though. She has everything she’s ever wanted. She’s the Prime Minister, the head of the party, the one in charge, finally. 

Her ex-husband is no longer a thorn in her side, though he’s still around. She doesn’t think she will ever actually rid herself of him. He is still Chief Whip, but he understands his place. He recognises that he could have been let go, made to disappear, joining the others who had tried to bring her down. John Vosler, Mike Travis, Rob Macdonald, Lorraine Craddock and David Budd. They’ve all been dismissed, demoted, moved sideways, relieved of their duties or reassigned, far away from her. Somewhere they cannot attempt to bring her down once again. Roger realises he held on to his position by the skin of his teeth and he now knows what she expects of him. 

She takes in her reflection, smiling at herself, be it somewhat forlorn. She is The Right Honourable Julia Elizabeth Montague, Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. She has survived assasination attempts, internal coups and spies sent disguised as lovers, and she is still here. No, she is not  _ just _ here. She is thriving. 

She is popular, and finds that her constituents love her...well, most of the time, anyway. She takes meeting after meeting with other leaders of the world and they all applaud her for her rise to power. She has a burgeoning (but secret) relationship with Jack, a French diplomat who she first met many years ago, but has only just recently gotten back in contact with. 

She has everything she’s ever wanted. But. She shakes her head ruefully. She doesn’t have to pretend that her life is perfect today. There is no one here but her. She blinks slowly at her reflection, like the little wrinkles that keep appearing under her eyes, cracks in her government and in her life are beginning to rear their ugly head in the shadows. Perhaps she should be happy she’s had close to three months of stability in her tenure... her honeymoon phase was never going to last forever, no matter how much she wanted it to. 

Her phone bleeps inside the pocket of her robe, and she reads the message, twice. She has to restrain herself from responding angrily. Her relationship with Jack is perhaps not so burgeoning, but maybe more diminishing. He wants to tell people about them, wants to announce that they are a couple, and he seems to be unable to accept the secrecy. He doesn’t seem to understand what telling the public about the two of them means. Not just for  _ her _ but  _ him, _ as well. They had a blazing row last night. He had come to visit her at Parliament, and had even had the gall to suggest they could simply walk out holding hands and that would be their perfect announcement to the world. 

She had accused him of being deluded, and had reminded him of the fact that he had known who and what she was before they had started dating. Her being the PM was not a surprise she had sprung on him, not like he had done to her when he had told her he had accepted another year long posting in London, all because of her. She reads the message again.  **How long do you expect me to stay a secret?**

She takes a deep breath and begins to type.  **Until there is a right moment.**

His reply is fast, as if he has been waiting for her response.  **Never, then.**

She sighs and presses her index finger to the side of her forehead. She never remembers him being this obstinate when she had known him in the past. But back then, he was the up and coming one. Now she’s the one who has all the power, and maybe -- yet again -- he’s another man who can’t handle all that she represents. 

She does not have time today to placate him, so she begins to type, telling him exactly how she is feeling.  **Jack, that isn’t what I meant and you know it. Right does not mean never. When you want to talk about this like an adult, I will be here to continue this conversation. Until then, I am busy.**

She presses send as there is a soft knock on the bathroom door. She looks to see if Jack is typing a response; he isn’t. She rolls her eyes. Clearly, he does not want to be an adult at the moment. She understands why he doesn’t like being a secret, of course. She knows how secrets can destroy lives. But he has to understand her perspective and if he doesn’t want to, then they aren’t going to be able to continue on. He’ll be added to the list of men that have failed her. 

It had all seemed so simple when they had met up with one another again. He had seemed happy to date her quietly. He told her that he understood her job came first, but now he seems to want more. And she doesn’t know if she is ready to give him what he wants. 

There is another knock, followed by a quiet voice. “Ma’am?” The voice questions uncertainly. It is Veronica, her private secretary. She doesn’t reply, but Veronica continues anyway, “I’ve brought you four options to wear today, ma’am.” 

Julia drops her phone back into the pocket of her robe, and she turns her attention back to her reflection in the mirror. She needs to push Jack out of her mind. Today is an important day. She moves a curl from the side of her face and tucks it behind her ear. She is still getting used to having longer hair and the maintenance it requires to appear presentable at all times. She hears Veronica shuffle outside the door and she realises she has not answered her. 

“Thank you, Veronica.” She says with fake brightness. 

She is good at pretending she is okay, hiding her emotions and true feelings most of the time. She has to. Emotions can be used against her. 

“You’re welcome.” Veronica answers before she continues, “Kim also needs to see you as soon as possible. She is downstairs.” 

“You may send her up.” Julia replies. She has no issue seeing Kim while getting ready, Kim, she is almost like family these days. She’s seen her in worse scrapes than watching her as she gets ready for the day in her bathrobe. 

“I’ll get her at once,” Veronica replies, and Julia hears her secretary leave. 

She takes this as her opportunity to leave the bathroom, padding across the carpet toward her bedroom. The hallway is dark, as the sun has not yet risen. But Julia has always been an early riser. She opens her door and slips inside the room. Veronica has indeed left her four options hanging on the end of her bed. She discards two of them immediately. They are clearly not the look she is going for today, and then chooses the navy pantsuit and white blouse with a bow. 

She has just finished slipping her stockinged feet into her grey heels when she hears Kim outside. Kim knocks once and then enters the room. She smiles kindly, “I am sorry to bother you so early, Julia.” Julia shakes her head and Kim continues, “I’ve had a worrying message from Anne Sampson.” 

Julia moves towards the window and stares out into the dark London street below Number 10. She takes a deep breath. A message from Anne is not usually one of her favourite things to be presented with first thing in the morning. She steeled herself for Kim’s response and then answered her PPO. “You’d better tell me what’s going on then.” 

The alarm blares from beside his bed, he reaches out, eyes still closed and hits the snooze button. He pulls the blanket over his head and scrunches his eyes closed tightly. Maybe he can squeeze in another few moments of sleep. But before he is successful, his alarm sounds again. This time he switches it off, yawning and moving into a sitting position, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with his fingers. He thinks he slept well, he doesn’t feel as exhausted this morning as he sometimes does, and his throat doesn’t feel hoarse, meaning he cannot have woken up screaming at any point in the night. 

His bedroom is still dark; the sun still sleeping. He has the morning off from work today and wonders if, perhaps, he should have set his alarm for much later. But he was determined last night to get up early and go for a run. He can see his trainers in the corner of the room. He had purposefully left them there so he could see them as soon as he woke up. He sighs and pushes himself from the bed before he can change his mind. 

Closing the door of his flat, he leans back against the brick wall and begins to stretch, starting with his legs, then his back and finally his arms. He jumps up and down a few times, breathing deeply before putting his headphones into his ears and he steps into the street; first, walking, then striding and finally running. He quickly finds an easy rhythm, his feet hitting the pavement over and over again. He has never loved running. He had always felt he’d done more than enough in the army, running from bombs and gunfire. He turns left toward the small park close to his flat, giving a polite nod to a fellow jogger. Running along half-darkened London streets was simple compared to what he had done in Helmand, so, when his therapist had recommended he make more of a conscious effort to run a few months ago, he had decided to follow the suggestion, instead of ignoring it. 

He laps the small park, once and then twice. He avoids three dogs, one a very exuberant black puppy, who chases him, nipping at his ankle until his owner, a young blonde woman in pristine athletic wear, calls the dog back. It barked and then scampered off, leaving him on his own once again. He pauses a moment, stopping by the fence to breathe deeply. 

The music in his ears cuts out as his phone begins to ring. He pulls the device from his pocket, groaning as he notices the name. Williams, his new boss. He had replaced Craddock a few months ago. She had been removed from her position and demoted quickly and quietly in circumstances David is not sure he wants to completely know. He sighs as he lifts his phone to his ear. Hearing from any of his superiors this early in the morning is never a good sign. Especially on a morning off.

“Sir?” he questions, his voice more breathless than he expected it to be. 

“Sergeant Budd,” Williams says quickly, before continuing, not waiting for David to respond. “We’ll need to change your assignment today. Fenton has a stomach bug.” 

“Aye.” He replies by way of agreement. He doesn’t remember what Tom was to be doing today, he only knows that he was meant to be accompanying the Canadian Prime Minister’s wife on a tour of London.  _ Was, _ past tense.

“Fenton had been called in to provide support for Knowles,” Williams explains and David feels a knot forming in the pit of his stomach. Immediately he knows where Tom was to be and where he is now expected. “There are a series of meetings today between the PM and numerous visiting foreign dignitaries.” 

David nods. “I see, sir,” he says non-committedly, wondering what he can say so that he does not end up in the same room with the beloved new PM. He comes up empty.

“You will need to be there in two hours. You may contact Knowles if you have any questions. I know you and she have worked together in the past,” Williams continues, and David listens intently for any hint of malice in his boss’ voice. It is no secret that he once worked with Kim. It is even less of a secret that he was dismissed under intriguing circumstances. “You have an email about the location.” His boss adds, before he bids David goodbye and the phone line goes silent. 

David wipes the sweat from his brow. “Shit.” He murmurs as he shoves his phone back into his pocket and heads for home. 

He has two hours, in two hours he has to come face to face with the Prime Minister. Normally, this wouldn’t be an issue, but this is not just  _ any _ Prime Minister, she is none other than the Right Honourable Julia Elizabeth Montague. 

The same person who months ago, he had been able to call  _ Julia.  _

**_Four months earlier …_ **

_ Her voice is quiet. The door to the hotel suite had barely locked behind them and she was in his arms. “Someone tried to kill me... again,” she whispers brokenly, her face tucked securely into his neck.  _ __

_ “I know,” he replies as he kisses the crown of her head.  _ __

_ She shakes her head. “Why?” she begins. “Why does this keep happening, David?” she questions as she raises her face from his chest.  _ __

_ “You know why,” he answers simply and she looks at him, her confusion evident. He doesn’t know what it is about her face and how she is peering at him so innocently. But he knows he can no longer lie to her. He can no longer pretend that he doesn’t have half of an idea about what is going on behind closed doors.  _

_ He has to tell her the truth, even though he knows that when he does, she will never look at him in the same way, ever again.  _

_ He wants so desperately to wipe away the lone tear that has fallen from her left eye. Kiss her softly and take her to bed until they are both physically and emotionally spent. But he can’t.  _

_ He’s made a decision. He cannot lie to her anymore.  _

_ “Julia,” he says seriously, “we need to talk.”  _

_ She steps back from him, removing herself from his embrace. His words register and she blinks once, twice, three times before she looks down at the floor. When her head raises again, her tears are gone. The hard gaze and the wall that was there when they first met is back, and suddenly he knows he’s already lost her. He’s lost her before he can even tell her the truth, and explain the whole situation.  _

_ In that moment, he knows it’s over.  _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kim is holding a door open for the two of them and Julia is about to thank Veronica for her diligence when she catches sight of someone standing at the end of the hall. 
> 
> It’s him.
> 
> David. 
> 
> For a second, she loses control of herself, one of her grey heels stumbles slightly, and she wants to curse at her reaction, the pull he still has over her. She is the bloody PM, she cannot be thrown off course by anyone standing in front of her. 
> 
> But then, she reconciles, he isn’t just anyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all of your amazing comments. I was truly overwhelmed. I would love to hear what you think of this chapter. 
> 
> I have quite a few words up my sleeve, all of you have definitely motivated them!
> 
> Extra thanks to my WT for her beta skills.
> 
> Enjoy!

Two hours pass quickly, almost too quickly. He doesn’t remember the last time he ran home so fast. A shower, and a half-eaten breakfast of toast and three gulps of coffee is all that he had had before he found himself on his way to the station, and then off to where Williams had told him to be. He had quickly walked through to the locker room, changing into a different shirt and collecting his vest, his earpiece and then finally his weapon. He managed to hitch a ride with a uniformed crew who were on their way to exchange shifts outside Number 10. He had almost laughed when he realised her meetings will be held within walking distance to her new residence. Although, of course, she wouldn’t be walking. He wonders why she chose this location, but he doesn’t expect he will get the chance to ask her. 

He expects their contact to be limited. 

It shouldn’t matter that he knows what the principal looks like when she smiles, what sounds she made when she used to come undone in his arms, and it certainly doesn’t matter that once upon a time, he was there to chase her bad dreams away. 

He chuckles mirthlessly as the car pulls into a designated space.  _ Once upon a time _ , he thinks, though his life isn’t like one of the books he has read to Ella before bed. He’s a real person, with a real life and just for today, he will have to see the woman who he had once shared a bed with. He hasn’t bothered to call Kim, as he doesn’t have any questions. He knows what his duty is to be today; back up to the protection team of the Prime Minister. Twelve hours at most, and he can be home again, perhaps he can surprise the kids with some dessert tonight. He would have to give Vicky a call, check to see that she doesn’t have anything planned. 

The Prime Minister’s meetings are being held in a posh hotel in Westminster, the Corinithia. His email from Williams explained that she has reserved the second level of the hotel for the next two days. There is one meeting room and one executive hotel suite that have been booked for her official business.

“Thanks, mate,” he says, farewelling the officers as he climbs from the back of the police car and steps out into the street. He runs his hands over the sleeves of his fitted suit jacket, buttoning it carefully and then adjusting his tie as he scans the street for danger. There is the usual crowd of businessmen and women strolling the London street and a few additional uniformed police officers circling the perimeter. He nods carefully at one as he shows his badge and he slips inside the back service entrance as he tucks his earpiece into his ear. There is the usual chatter taking place, but no sign of Kim’s voice and he assumes this means  _ she _ is yet to arrive.

He smiles briefly at another officer and then heads for the stairs, stepping up them two at a time. He reaches a long hallway and positions himself next to a hideous painting. He is sure Ella could even make something more appealing, but given where he is, he is sure this piece of artwork is worth a small fortune. He clasps his hands together, interlocking his fingers and he waits. 

He waits to see her again.

  
  


She is half listening to two conversations; one via phone with Martin, her Chancellor, and one with the young woman beside her, her ever-present private secretary, Veronica. Since she stepped from her bedroom, just a short time ago Veronica has been her shadow, even reminding Julia that she had left her private phone on the desk beside her. Veronica is shuffling papers in her lap and occasionally will ask Julia if this particular document ‘looks alright.’ Julia has been nodding and paying attention to her as best as she can, despite the difficulty of the constant voice chattering from the other end of the phone. 

Martin reminds her that she needs to ensure she has several discussions today about funding for the latest round of manufacturing stimulus. He understands what the main reason is for her meetings, but he also wants to make sure that his agenda is being pushed, as well. The delicate balance of what she wants for the country, compared to those in the rest of the party, is still something she spends too much time thinking about. 

“Julia,” he continues persistently. “You know that despite the benefits you announced last week, we are going to need something else to limit the possible damage this may cause.” She can hear him pause for a moment, before she hears him sigh and he adds. “Both to you and the party as a whole.” His voice is extremely convincing; it is one of the reasons she chose him to be in her Cabinet, the dulcet tones and honeyed phrases she has heard him convince many others with. However, she is tougher. She’s had to be. She nods to herself and stifles a groan as her driver manoeuvres the car into its parking space. She wonders why Martin keeps reminding her of the same things over and over again; she is the PM, and she has a pretty good memory. She knows what she’s doing. 

“Martin,” she begins as she nods towards Veronica. “I understand your concerns. But, you need to realise that I have it all in hand.” Veronica smirks towards her as she holds a list in her hands and is showing her the proposed schedule, six meetings, one representative of each of the five member countries of the Five Eyes Intelligence Alliance in attendance. Two in person meetings, and two telephone conferences and there is also one meeting with the Prime Minister of Grenada. Each of the meetings are scheduled to be an hour in length and then the day will end with a dinner at Number 10. The Canadian Prime Minister and his wife are to be the guests of honour. Julia had just remembered to approve the menu as she left the residence this morning. Her personal chef had met her in the hallway, and wanted her sign off before she sent out for the supplies. 

She half checks her other phone, the phone Veronica had reminded her not to forget, but there are no new messages. Jack has not replied. She was half expecting to hear from him again this morning. He is usually more persistent, but then again, given the message she had sent as she was getting ready, she’s not completely surprised this time. She wonders if she won’t hear from him ever again. As she sighs, she wonders if she should feel more devastated by this realisation.  _ No, you don’t have time to think about this. _ She checks the phone is on silent before she slips it into the internal pocket of her blazer. She will have to speak to him later. 

She nods again at Veronica. Martin is still cross-checking facts in her ear and she contemplates hanging up on him. But the last thing she needs is someone else who wants to disagree with her and then for it to be reported that she and her Chancellor have a difference of opinion. Her driver has barely shut off the ignition as she begins to climb from the backseat. She meets her driver’s eyes in the mirror as she departs, he smiles kindly at her, and she gives a small smile in return. She appreciated his skilled driving this morning, a protest and an accident on the Westway have left her barely on time for these important meetings, despite the short distance they have had to travel. 

Kim opens her door quickly and then steps to one side as Julia steps onto the concrete floor. “Martin,” she interrupts. “I have arrived, I need to go,” she adds hurriedly as Veronica appears beside her and hands her a single piece of paper. Martin protests on the other end of the line for a few more seconds before he realises he has lost her attention and farewells her, not before reminding her one last time about manufacturing funding. Julia stops for a moment and scans the paper, before handing it back to Veronica, who slips it back into a larger file and tucks it under her arm. 

“Ma’am,” Kim begins as she holds her arm out towards the lift. “This way please.” Julia takes a deep breath and straightens her blazer. Today is a big day. It is extremely important that all of these meetings go well. So far, she has been welcomed to her new role, but she isn’t daft. She realises that it only takes one mistake for the tide to change. She has seen it happen. She wants to begin making her mark and she can begin today, the reintroduction of the bill that she has had on the backburner for the last couple of months. It hadn’t seemed a great idea to start her tenure with something so controversial, but she believes that if she is ever to see her idea come to fruition, she needs to start now, and she needs to use her growing popularity. 

Veronica enters the lift first and Julia follows, Kim enters last and presses the button for the second floor. The doors close and Kim turns towards her. “We have made additional security arrangements today, ma’am,” she begins to explain, her head tilting to one side as the two of them make eye contact. Julia nods in agreement as Kim continues. “We thought it was best given the elevated threat level.”

“And the additional security,” Julia questions. “Have they been informed as to why they were requested?” Kim shakes her head and Julia feels relieved, she is still paranoid about leaks. People have tried to destroy her time and time again, and she will not let them succeed, not when she has the role that she has desired for her entire political career. 

“I made the request personally, ma’am,” Kim explains. “I called in some favours.” She adds as the lift reaches their floor and Julia nods and smiles, thank goodness for Kim. 

As the lift doors open and Kim steps out into the hall, Veronica takes this cease in conversation to speak. “Prime Minister, you have approximately ten minutes until your first meeting arrives,” Veronica explains quickly as she begins to follow Kim. Kim is holding a door open for the two of them and Julia is about to thank Veronica for her diligence when she catches sight of someone standing at the end of the hall. 

It’s him.

_ David.  _

For a second, she loses control of herself, one of her grey heels stumbles slightly, and she wants to curse at her reaction, the pull he still has over her. She is the bloody PM, she cannot be thrown off course by anyone standing in front of her. 

But then, she reconciles, he isn’t just anyone. 

She hasn’t seen him in months, not since he told her he had betrayed her. She feels a slight flash of pain, as her stomach flips. She used to think out of all the people she had to protect her in the past, she would’ve been able to trust him. He was paid to protect her, and he had, more than once. She would not be alive without him, even she knows that. 

She had allowed him into her bed, and into her heart. But she had been wrong, so  _ very _ wrong. He protected her because he was paid to, because she was a pawn in a larger game. 

She never should have trusted him. 

_ She chews her bottom lip carefully as her driver navigates the traffic back to the Home Office. The car is silent, as David has slipped into the seat in front of her. Neither he, nor her relatively new driver, have said anything since they left St. Matthews.  _

_ Her speech was a success, save for a few protestors who were quickly dealt with. She had heard the murmurs of the crowd as she had not-so-subtly dropped her announcement that she was going to challenge the leadership of the party, and therefore of the country.  _

_ There had been no questions allowed at the end of her remarks, and she had thanked the crowd then disappeared quickly to collect her belongings from the green room. She tapped her fingers absentmindedly on the grey handbag beside her. She almost wants to ask for the radio to be switched on, to see if anyone is reporting on her speech and if anyone has made the connection between what she has said and what has also been occurring in London as a whole.  _

_ She doesn’t ask for the radio, however, she simply stares at the back of David’s head. She can tell he is concentrating on the scene around them and as he tilts his head from side to side, she catches sight of the curls at the back of his neck. It takes her a moment to remind herself that they are not alone and she cannot reach out and touch him, just because she feels like it.  _

_ She stares again at the seat beside her and she wonders what it would be like to have  _ someone _ , no, not someone, to have  _ David _ sit beside her. To be there to reassure her that she is doing her best and that he wants to spend time with her not because he is paid and it is his job, but simply because he chooses to be there.  _

_ He has yet to say anything to her about what she had said earlier. They had made eye contact a few times during her speech, and just as her speech ended, she could swear she saw one of the corners of his lips turn up into a small smile.  _

_ She reaches up to touch her neck gingerly. There is a small thumb shaped bruise just above her collar bone on her left side, but she had covered it carefully with concealer this morning; Remnants of David’s hands tightening around her throat in the small hours of the morning.  _

_ David is dangerous, last night had proved that, but she would rather be in danger with him, than safe with anyone else.  _

_ She thinks, perhaps, that is why he hasn’t said anything to her, that he was so convinced that after today, she would have him dismissed and they’d never seen one another again.  _

_ Realistically this is what she should be doing. David shouldn’t have even been there to escort her to St. Matthews this afternoon. As soon as he had done what he had, she should have called his superiors. But it seems that when it comes to David Budd, she does many things she should never do.  _

_ “We should be there in approximately ten minutes ma’am,” her driver, Jeremy, announces, his voice cutting into her thoughts.  _

_ “Thank you,” she replies quickly as she turns her head back to stare out of the window. In his limited time as her driver, she has come to appreciate Jeremy and the tenacity with which he has approached his job, especially because of what had happened to his incumbent. She takes a moment to think of Terry, killed because of a bullet meant for her. That was never the way she saw his tenure as her driver coming to an end. She feels guilty about Terry being killed every day. She knows her job is dangerous, but someone being killed because of her... she doesn’t think she will ever get used to that. She  _ never  _ wants to get used to that.  _

_ They have slowed at a traffic light and she momentarily watches a young woman holding the hand of a small child. The little girl is skipping along happily, a bright smile on her face, and Julia cannot help smiling herself. Things could finally, after much work and careful consideration, be falling into place.  _

_ Her reverie is interrupted by the sound of David’s telephone, he answers and lifts the phone to his ear. “P.S. Budd,” he says diligently and then she observes him nod to himself. The call ends with him saying, “Yes ma’am. See you soon, ma’am.”  _

_ She raises an eyebrow as David turns to Jeremy. “Change of route,” he announces, before he raises his gaze to meet hers in the mirror. “Commander Sampson,” he begins, “Ma’am, she needs to see you in her office, as soon as possible.”  _

  
  


_ Her feet tap softly on the floor beneath her. David had escorted her quickly through the corridors of the police building. He had knocked carefully and when there had been no response, the two of them had slipped inside, neither of them said anything, but she could sense that David was just as perplexed as she was, as to the reasoning for this unexpected meeting.  _

_ Anne’s office is empty and Julia is drawn immediately to the stunning view of London outside of the large office windows. The river flows peacefully and there are people strolling along one of the many bridges. Julia watches them contently and she wonders what they are thinking and how they are feeling on this November afternoon.  _

_ For a moment, Julia contemplates asking if there is a trade off of offices to be done. Her office view at the Home Office, while pretty, is nowhere near as decadent. But, if things fall into place for her, she could perhaps almost be the PM by the end of the week and the view from Number 10, well, that would most certainly do.  _

_ There is a lone chair in front of Anne’s desk and as Julia sits down, she crosses her ankles over each other and then interlocks her fingers, rolling her thumbs around one another; her small way of releasing some of her nervous energy. _

_ She can hear David behind her, his soft breathing and the shuffling of his feet and she finds it reassuring. She isn’t alone here. He is here with her, perhaps not beside her yet. But, behind her, and this will be enough for now.  _

_ She steals one last look out of Anne’s window and then is distracted, as the door opens and Anne strides into the room. Julia turns her head and nods as she meets the Commander’s gaze. Anne is immaculate in her presentation. Julia expects no less.  _

_ Julia regards her carefully as Anne walks towards the two of them. Her hair is fashioned in a low bun, and she is dressed completely in black. Julia thinks she almost looks as if she is going to a funeral and she wonders if the Commander would still like it to be hers. _

_ “Home Secretary,” Anne says. “P.S Budd,” she adds as she carries a large file and drops it onto her desk. “Thank you for coming.”  _

_ “Ma’am.” Julia hears David mutter and Julia thinks it strange to hear him refer to someone else with the moniker she has come to think of as her own.  _

_ Anne is staring at her carefully and Julia straightens her head and stares back. “You needed to see me?” She responds, half question, half statement.  _

_ “I did.” Anne replies as she takes a seat behind her desk. “I have had word from my officers at St. Matthews.”  _

_ Julia nods, one of her eyebrows raising in confusion. St. Matthews has been and gone. “College staff were completing the cleaning and reorganisation of the premises,” Anne explains, before she continues. “Home Secretary, they found something underneath the stage.”  _

_ Julia feels her heart race and she could swear she heard David breathe more deeply behind her. Thank goodness he is here. Julia purses her lips. “Found what, exactly?”  _

_ “The staff were replacing chairs and other sound equipment to a storage area.”  _

_ Julia shakes her head, at this particular moment, she couldn't care less about what the staff were doing or not doing. “Commander Sampson,” Julia begins. “What did they find?” _

_ “A search of the premises,” Anne states seriously, as Julia wishes she would just speak faster. “Uncovered an unexploded device.”  _

_ Julia feels her fingers tremble. “An unexploded device,” she repeats almost unbelievingly.  _

_ Anne flips the file in front of her open, pointing at an image, Julia breathes through her nose. “At cursory inspection, it seems to be similar to the one used on 1/10 and the Heath Bank attack.” Julia nods slowly as Anne continues. “Home Secretary, this one seems to have been fitted with a pressure sensor.”  _

_ Julia nods again.  _

_ “I am sure I don’t need to tell you.” Anne begins. “But if this device had done what it was set to do...” _

_ Julia clenches her hands into fists as realisation crosses her mind. “I wouldn’t be here,” she breathes softly.  _

_ Someone wants her dead.  _

Shit.

_ They still want her dead.  _

_ An ambush didn’t kill her, so they’d set a bomb for her instead.  _

_ If it had completed its task, she  _ would be dead. __

_ She is still in danger.  _

_ “Home Secretary,” Anne questions, as she regards Julia carefully. Julia wonders what reaction Anne was expecting from her. Did she expect her to scream? To lecture her about links to the Security Service? To demand answers? Julia can tell that Anne did not expect this kind of silence.  _

_ “There is no doubt your security arrangements will need to be reviewed.” Anne explains as she turns her attention to David. “P.S. Budd, you will need to take a different route back to the Blackwood.” _

_ “Understood, ma’am,” David answers formally.  _

_ “Home Secretary, your suite at the Blackwood is being swept as we speak.” Anne explains, as Julia panics momentarily. She isn’t completely sure there is no evidence of David being an unexpected and unallowed guest in her room. “It is still one of the safest places for you, especially with your PPO so close at hand.”  _

_ “Thank you,” Julia manages to say, her voice sounding unlike hers. She sounds so meek, so mild to her own ears, and she cannot stand it.  _

_ Anne sits forward and clasps her hands together. “I know we asked you at the time of the Thornton Circus attack, but are you sure you do not know of any reason, why someone wishes to do you harm?” _

_ Julia shakes her head. “No,” she lies. There is more than one reason why someone may want her gone: RIPA-18, the secret kompromat she has on the PM, now hidden in her flat inside a photo frame, the only other person with a hint of its location is the man who stands behind her, and then more broadly, there are people who just don’t like her in general. She’s too powerful. She makes too many important decisions or she has too much influence over the lives of the ordinary citizens she can still see crossing the bridge outside Anne’s window.  _

_ Anne blinks at her and Julia is not sure if she is believed, but the Commander does not challenge her. “I will be in touch if there are any more developments, Home Secretary,” she explains as she closes the file in front of her. “There is an additional backup vehicle waiting downstairs for you.” Anne stands then and Julia takes this as her hint that her presence is no longer desired, and she stands too, making sure her trembling hands cannot be seen by the other woman.  _

_ “Thank you. I will see you at the Home Office,” Julia states, momentarily finding her voice, determined to still have the last word and to not lose face in front of her adversary.  _

_ Anne’s office door opens and an assistant enters and David gestures towards Julia. “This way ma’am,” he says softly and she feels slightly calmer at the sound of his voice. He steps into the white hallway first, checking from side to side as she follows behind him to the elevator.  _

_ The elevator doors slide open and the two of them step inside. She shuffles past him first and then he follows. As they stand there together, side by side, neither of them speak. She doesn’t know what to say.  _

_ They’d found an unexploded device hidden underneath the stage floor and should it have blown up; if it had, she wouldn’t have been standing there beside him. She doesn’t know how to reconcile this.  _

_ The elevator reaches the basement too fast for her liking and she cannot seem to move. David gently touches her lower back, his palm warm against her blazer, edging her forward.  _

_ She breathes deeply once more, clenching her fingers into fists. She can do this, she will be okay, she isn’t alone.  _

_ David is beside her.  _

She had dealt with him swiftly; one well-placed phone call, and he had been gone. He had never even tried to contact her once she had excused him. Once she had told him to leave, he had done so. She had half-expected him to show more fight, to want to explain more about why he had done what he did. But he didn’t, and that told her everything that she had needed to know. 

She brushes the end of her sleeve and stands up straight. Kim steps forward and Julia wonders for a moment if this is Kim’s fault, if her personal favours involve the man that she used to refer to as ‘Skip.’ Kim continues to move down the hall. She seems unbothered by David’s presence, but then why should she be? It was never Kim, who had snuck in and out of adjoining rooms with the man standing at the end of the hall. Kim gestures Veronica and Julia towards an open door. Julia blinks once, slowly, of course it is the door that he is standing beside. 

She will have to walk next to him.

She adjusts her blazer and steps forward; her heels click on the wooden floor beneath her as she walks. She stares straight in front of her, pretends he is not there, pretends as if his presence has not rattled her. She moves closer to him, in reaching distance, and for a moment she wonders if he is going to acknowledge her. But he remains still, unmoving and unflinching, as if her proximity to him has not rattled him in the slightest. 

As she steps into the meeting room and the door closes, she lets out a breath she didn’t realise she had been holding. Veronica stares at her perplexedly, “Ma’am, are you alright?” 

“Fine.” Julia replies tersely. “We need to get on,” she adds as Veronica sets files down on the desk in front of them both. Veronica nods and Julia clasps her hands together. She can do this. It doesn’t matter that he is just outside that door. He is no longer her PPO, he is just here to be back up. He will be here for one day and then he will be gone. 

Nothing has changed. 

Nothing. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julia shakes her head. “We,” she begins, gesturing between the two of them, “are done here,” She adds, the finality in her voice coupled with her looking past him, as if he no longer exists. 
> 
> He stands there a moment and wonders if he should try to argue with her. To see if he can make her see sense, but then he thinks, why should he bother? She has the Great British public fooled that she is the rising star of the party, with all the charisma and power to boot. Perhaps he’s just another one who has fallen under the Right Honourable Julia Montague’s spell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once again for all of your lovely comments. It makes my heart burst when I read them. 
> 
> Thanks Ally for your beta skills, as always.
> 
> Love to hear what you all think of this next chapter.

_ “Sierra Zulu Four Six, Lavender inbound.”  _

He has been standing watch beside the painting for only a few moments when he hears Kim’s familiar voice. He brushes at a piece of lint on the collar of his jacket and shakes his hands softly, releasing the build up of tension that he has suddenly begun to feel. He stares straight ahead, eyes unmoving, focused towards the end of the hallway, where the lift is located. 

The doors slide open and David can hear the soft murmurs of her private secretary’s voice. Veronica, he thinks her name is. She is relatively new to her job and for just a moment, David wonders if she is better than Chanel, or if perhaps, Veronica at least _ likes _ Julia more than Chanel did. He also finds himself wondering what happened to Chanel. The last time he had seen her, she had been climbing into the back of a Range Rover outside the Home Office, and he has heard all sorts of rumours about her since. Honestly, he hadn’t been sure what the truth was about her to begin with. But when he had surreptitiously been demoted from his position as the former Home Secretary’s PPO, he had allowed many of the things he had uncovered during his tenure to fall by the wayside. 

Kim steps from the lift first, holding her arm in front of the door, and Veronica follows. Veronica has cropped, chestnut blonde hair and David watches the young woman, who is dressed in a black pantsuit as she steps confidently into the hallway. She is holding a file under her arm and is gesturing towards her boss. 

He wonders if he hears Julia before he sees her. The sound of her heels clicking against the wooden floor is a sound he thought he had forgotten. But as soon as she steps from the lift, heading in his direction with her heels clipping repetitively, he is taken back. Taken right back to the sound of her in her adjoining suite, with him listening carefully for her approach, waiting for her to invite him to cross the threshold. 

He continues to stare forward, looking just past her. If she is surprised to see him, she doesn’t let her emotions show. He does wonder, if for just a moment, one of her heels stumbles as she leaves the lift. But, before he can even consider that as a possibility, she is walking toward him. She adjusts the sleeve of her blazer and begins to walk forward, looking every bit the perfect Prime Minister. 

He doesn’t acknowledge her as she moves closer, though he guesses he is probably meant to. He should deign to her presence, even just utter one word, ‘ma’am,’ perhaps that would have been appropriate. She is the PM, after all, and he is now just one of her many constituents. But he cannot bring himself to do it and she doesn’t look his way either, so it appears that if she has noticed him at all, she doesn't care. It has been months since they’ve seen each other in person. 

  
  


_ “Julia,” he says seriously, “we need to talk.”  _

_ She steps back from him, removing herself from his embrace. His words register and she blinks once, twice, three times before she looks down at the floor. When her head raises again, her tears are gone. The hard gaze and the wall that was there when they first met has returned. Suddenly, he knows he’s already lost her. He’s lost her before he can even tell her the truth, and explain the whole situation.  _

_ In that moment, he knows it’s already over.  _

_ He can feel his heart beating in his throat and swallows hard. She is staring at him, her eyes boring into his, as she looks at him with obvious contempt. He is unsure that anything he says will make a difference now. But yet, he feels he needs to continue. _

_ He breathes deeply again. “You’re in danger, Julia.”  _

_ He watches as she scoffs to herself, interlocking her fingers in front of her. “I would say that is fairly obvious, David... Given that we have just been told that there was a bomb meant for me underneath that stage.”  _

_ Her tone is sarcastic, but he doesn’t miss the slight tremble of her fingers.  _

_ “Aye,” he says flatly. “And you’re sure you dunno the reason why?” He wonders if she will tell him anything. If the ‘trust’ she has previously claimed to have in him still exists. She shakes her head, ever the perfect politician facade, only visible to him now.  _

_ Julia is gone. _

_ “You were the one wanting to talk.” She states. “Why am I the one expected to be speaking?”  _

_ It is his turn to scoff now. She has employed the stereotypical politician response, answering a question with a question of her own. He stares at her and for a moment and he wonders if perhaps he could just try and pretend he never said anything. If he could get away with crossing the threshold, and taking her in his arms.  _

_ But, that wouldn’t solve anything. It would just make things more complicated. The heavy burden of lies would still lay between them, even when they were sleeping beside each other in her bed.  _

_ “We know about your meetings with the secret service,” he tells her plainly. “Your dealings with Stephen Hunter-Dunn...” he adds, watching as she raises her brow.  _

_ “My meetings with the secret service...” Julia repeats blankly. “You are aware that I’m the Home Secretary… I am expected to meet with them. It is part of my job.” She adds matter-of-factly, as she tilts her head to the side.  _

_ He has to stop himself from smirking back at the lie he’s caught her in.  _

_ “Are they meant to come to your hotel room?” He suggests, recalling the meeting with the shadowy figure, Richard Longcross, he had met in the hallway. “They asked me to monitor your meetings. I was to record them and report back what I had found.” _

_ She unlocks her fingers and raises her arms to her chest, folding them across herself defensively. “Who?” she asks harshly. “Wait,” she pauses. “I can guess.” _

_ He nods at her, having expected she would know who had made the request of him. He is about to open his mouth to attempt to explain when she interrupts him.  _

_ “For how long?” _

_ He recalls the first request made of him, to monitor her behaviour. “After Thornton Circus.” He admits and he watches as she scowls.  _

_ “Before or after you were placed in the adjoining room?” She questions quickly, and he knows what she is trying to subtly ask. She doesn’t allow him time to respond though and asks him harshly. “Did they tell you to fuck me, as well?” He blinks rapidly as she continues, her tone challenging him to answer and answer quickly. “Just answer the question, please, David.”  _

_ He shakes his head. “No,” he tells her seriously. “They have no idea about the two of us.”  _

_ Her eyes narrow. “The two of us?” she questions and he can see she is holding back an eye roll. He can sense she has more to say about this topic, but then she changes the subject suddenly. “Do they know about last night?”  _

_ He shakes his head. “Even I don’t know what last night was about.”  _

_ “Good,” she states quickly. “After all, it never happened.” _

_ “You want to be the Prime Minister,” he states plainly. He isn’t sure of many things at the present moment, but the strongest desire of the woman standing in front of him now seems quite clear. “You are going to take Vosler down in collusion with the security service, and then assume his job in the carnage.”  _

_ She laughs mirthlessly. “Clever,” she retorts, before adding sarcastically. “Did you work this out all on your own? Or is this all part of the Sergeant Budd spying service?”  _

_ “They don’t know about the PM,” He admits. He wants her to know that he has kept most of her secrets, only letting his superiors know what was absolutely necessary. _

_ She tilts her head to the side, regarding him carefully. He can tell she is trying to decide if he is lying or not, and he wonders if his face is as unreadable as hers can be... though right now, he is pretty sure he can see her thoughts calculating in her brain. “You didn’t tell them?” she questions, the confusion evident in her voice.  _

_ “No.” He says quickly and he sees her confusion only grow as she furrows her brow.  _

_ “Should I ask why?” she questions cautiously.  _

_ David smirks. “I think you know why.” She shuffles on the spot, and he can tell he has shocked her. He doesn’t know how he feels about this. She nods slowly. “This doesn’t change the fact that you need to be careful, Julia.” He tells her seriously.  _

_ “Are you trying to tell me that you think the PM is trying to kill me?” She questions sarcastically, unfolding her arms and holding out one of her hands towards him as she speaks. “For one, Vosler,” she begins, “had no idea about anything that I was up to until last night.” She pauses for a moment. “That leaves the shooting,” she pauses again as her fingers tremble at the memory. “Unable to be plotted by him.”  _

_ “And you can trust the security service?” David questions as he watches her eyebrow raise. _

_ “You’re all the same,” she states plainly, the ire evident in her voice. “All of you in competition between one another, the police versus the spies,” she remarks, folding her arms across herself. “Why don’t you all agree to work together, to best take care of the damn country?”  _

_ “And that’s what you are doing?” He questions her. “Taking down a sitting PM for the good of the country?”  _

_ Julia shakes her head. “Vosler,” she begins, “does not deserve to be the PM.”  _

_ “And you do?” He asks quickly, the words flying out of his mouth before he can even think them through.  _

_ Julia scoffs.  _

_ “I am doing my duty as a public servant. And if I become the PM, I become the PM,” she tells him as she shrugs her shoulders.  _

_ “And if this duty gets you killed?”  _

_ “That is why I am  _ meant  _ to have you.”  _

_ “What?” David pauses. “So, your duty gets  _ me _ killed instead.”  _

_ “I don’t want  _ anyone _ to be killed.” She admits to him quietly, and he can see the shaking in her fingers once more. “But I have to do this.”  _

_ “And the next Thornton Circus?” he questions. “What happens then?” _

_ “The next…” Julia begins, her voice trailing off.  _

_ David shakes his head. “The people that are after you, Julia, they aren’t going to give up.”  _

_ “They’ll be third time lucky then,” Julia smirks, and David can’t quite work out why she is being so flippant about any of this. She needs to take her life seriously. She has to. She cannot become another piece of collateral damage to a world that keeps becoming crazier by the day.  _

_ David breathes deeply, he stares at her carefully and thinks for a moment about all of the time he has spent in this room over the last few weeks because he knows once he tells her, this -- whatever they were -- will be over. But she needs to know. She needs to know how much danger she is in. Perhaps then she will reconsider her seemingly dangerous alliance with Hunter-Dunn. “There is more you need to know,” he says quietly, as he raises his eyes to meet hers. “The gunman,” he says, pausing as he chooses his wording carefully. “The man on the roof of Pascoe House, his name was Andy Apsted.”  _

_ She breathes hard. “Excuse me?”  _

_ “We were at Helmand together.”  _

_ Her eyes grow wide. “‘A nut job,’” she whispers. “‘Acting alone.’ That is what you told me.” She adds as she raises both of her now trembling hands to hold at the side of her head. “Are you telling me that you knew what he was going to do?” David shakes his head quickly but she continues on. “Were you in on it?” she questions almost disbelievingly.  _

_ David is quick to protest. “I had no idea.”  _

_ “Who else knows who he was?” she questions him quickly. “Knows about your connection to him?” He shakes his head again, as she asks quickly. “Why did you save me?” _

_ He scoffs, he’s almost offended by her inference. “It is my job to protect the principal.”  _

_ “Your job.” She repeats plainly, staring at him. He notices that her breathing has become ragged, more shallow, and he starts to wonder when his job changed from protecting her as her PPO to protecting her as someone he -- he stops himself from thinking about that -- whatever he thought this morning or even a few hours ago, those thoughts are finished now.  _

_ David remembers what she said just before her speech, the inference she made about her wanting him with her not because it was his job... He may never get another chance to reply. “What you said earlier,” he begins. Julia scoffs and steps backwards from him, cutting into his words.  _

_ “What I said earlier,” she repeats, “doesn’t matter. You can’t make the right decision if you don't have all of the facts.”  _

_ “You have them now.”  _

_ Her eyes narrow. “And that is meant to make things better, is it?” She questions him as she begins to pace around her suite, her arms falling to her side. “You’ve been hiding some pretty serious facts from me,” she lectures. “Your superiors have had my PPO -- that’s you -- spying on me.” She pauses, turning back to look at him, holding out one of her index fingers toward him. “It seems that all of this,” she says angrily. “Has to do with you.”  _

_ “You need to be careful, Julia.” David repeats for the umpteenth time. She’s not taking him seriously. He can tell. “You cannot trust the security service.”  _

_ She cackles at that. “It seems I cannot trust  _ anyone _ ,” she says slowly, before she lowers her voice. “But,” she pauses a moment and then continues. “I don’t see Stephen Hunter-Dunn with his hands around my neck.” His hackles rise as his guilt over last night resurfaces. He wonders if he has ever felt so sorry for anything in his entire life, and if she notices the feelings written on his face, she doesn't allow it to stop her from continuing. “Perhaps I am in more danger with  _ you _ than I am with anyone else.” _

_ He watches her smirk, the corner of her lip curve up. “I can explain,” he protests, and for a moment he wonders why. He can only think that he stupidly cares for this  _ politician _ in front of him and he cannot believe that he has been so idiotic to think that she was anything other than what Sampson had refered to her as. Dangerous.  _

_ Julia shakes her head. “We,” she begins, gesturing between the two of them, “are done here,” She adds, the finality in her voice coupled with her looking past him, as if he no longer exists.  _

_ He stands there a moment and wonders if he should try to argue with her. To see if he can make her see sense, but then he thinks, why should he bother? She has the Great British public fooled that she is the rising star of the party, with all the charisma and power to boot. Perhaps he’s just another one who has fallen under the Right Honourable Julia Montague’s spell.  _

_ He looks at her one last time, the sharp curve of her jawline, the delicate gold chain around her neck, the tiny space between her earlobe and hairline that if he kissed in just the right spot, she would melt into his arms. She doesn’t raise her gaze back toward him. She is now staring at the floor and he begins to step towards the door of her suite.  _

_ “Leave,” she mumbles through gritted teeth, “through your room,” she hisses, and he turns back to look at her. She is glaring at him, her eyes narrowed and dark towards him. “Appearances,” she explains, “may mean fuck all to you. But they mean something to me.” She stares him down for a long, silent moment before adding, “I will not let you destroy me.”  _

_ He scoffs, thinking she’s doing a good job of that herself, but before he can make another remark, she turns on her heel and disappears into the bathroom. The door slams behind her and he is alone.  _

  
  


He has always wondered what made him reveal his secrets to her so easily. He’s considered his guilt, especially from the night before. He’s even considered that he just wanted to finally be open and honest with her, just as she had been before her speech at St. Matthews. 

The other idea that has stuck with him is a bit darker. That perhaps she could have been killed and would have never known the truth about the two of them, and what had been occurring behind her back. 

But, he has to admit the idea that sticks most in his mind is that it was for his own self protection. Tell her the truth and have her leave him. Have her leave because it was always going to happen anyway. Because they could never have been right for one another. It would be easier to cut the ties before they were bound together too tightly. 

No matter the reason, their conversation about his spying and her alliances was the last time they had been together, face to face. Two hours later, his presence had been requested -- no, demanded -- with Sampson. He had returned to her office once more and this time, she had not been alone. A thoroughly unimpressed Craddock had been in on the meeting also. The pair of them were fuming. Their masterplan, their connection to snoop on the Home Secretary, was now fractured. Sampson made her points first, questioning what had so suddenly changed between him leaving her office and the moment when she had to answer a late night phone call from a seething Julia Montague. 

Craddock explained that he was to be removed from Julia’s detail immediately. There was no other option, as Julia would not allow him back. She had made that perfectly clear. 

The two women had eventually let him leave, after both of them had announced they had nothing more to say to him. He had not heard from them until the following afternoon. When his presence had been requested by Anne once again, she had informed him that Kim would take his place for the moment. Someone new would eventually be promoted to Julia’s service. 

His family, despite the removal of his position as PPO to the Home Secretary, were allowed to remain living in their safehouse. It had been explained it was only until further investigation from the foiled train attack and the successful Heath Bank attack had been completed. He didn’t really understand why that was to be the case, but he did not question it. As long as his children were safe, he would be okay. They were what mattered to him most. 

David had gone back to the days before her, the days before he had met Julia. Foreign dignitaries and other Cabinet ministers had become the people he protected and he made sure to do his job to the best of his ability. He had also sought out a therapist, after a particularly confrontational recurring dream. One that had led to a worried Ella peering at him from the end of his bed. They had come to stay one night while Vicky was out with her new boyfriend. He still wasn’t sure how he felt about his former wife dating again, but if it meant he could see his children more, he would take the good with the bad. He was determined to be a good father, to be a good influence in the lives of his children, so to therapy he went. 

He had also kept waiting for someone to realise that he had known Andy; kept waiting for a phone call, a request for an interview, or even a surprise doorstep visit by the officers still investigating the attempt on the Home Secretary’s life. But they never came, and he didn’t dare to think why they never did. 

He had watched from a distance as Julia finally launched her planned coup and the PM had been unceremoniously removed from office. ‘A danger to the Great British public,’ she had called him. The full details of Vosler’s indiscretions had not been announced, but there had been enough information released for her to succeed in her task. He’d had to bite back a laugh at how utterly perfect she had appeared as she had announced she was to step in as the new PM, effective immediately. 

To David, it appeared that she had gotten everything she ever wanted, and for the last four months, she had ridden a wave of unprecedented popularity. The brave former Home Secretary who had survived not just one, but  _ two _ attempts on her life... He still isn’t sure who leaked the information about St. Matthews. Both Craddock and Sampson denied strenuously that it had been them. 

Everyone seems to love her, even her detractors who had done nothing but try to bring her down in the past, have seemed to fall into line and if they did not, they’ve been removed. He has still heard the occasional rumour about her and the agendas she has been trying to push.

Requests for her time have never been so desired, so much so that this hastily organised conference has been planned in less than a month. All of these facts, including the stomach bug of one of her most trusted PPOs, Tom, has led him here, to this hotel hallway and her walking straight toward him.

She is right beside him for just a second, and as she pauses outside the meeting room, he can smell the familiar scent of her perfume. Prime Minister Montague still smells the same as Home Secretary Montague used to. He remembers the smell overwhelming his senses as he shoved his clothing back into his bag, late one November night last year. 

One after another, he had scrunched his shirts, burying them into the bottom of his bag. He had waited days before washing them, dumping the whole load into the machine, not caring about sorting colours from white, and pretending he couldn’t still smell her. Pretending he couldn’t still remember the sight of her, removing his clothes and hers as quickly as she possibly could in the heat of the moment. 

He still doesn’t move, and he doesn’t turn his head to face her either. Kim enters the meeting room first, Veronica following dutifully behind. She eventually follows and he hears the soft sound of talking between the three women. The door remains open, and he cannot help but step slightly to the side, despite his outward appearance. He is still drawn to her. Veronica lingers off to the side of the room, her files are now on the desk in front of Julia and Kim is walking around the room doing a sweep of their surroundings. Without moving his head, David moves his eyes in her direction. Instead, he uses his peripheral vision to look at her, it seems he is unable not to. 

The first thought that strikes him is her hair. It is longer than the last time he had seen her in person, the chestnut strands are longer and instead of being curled, they rest in loose waves on her shoulders. She is wearing a white blouse with a bow tied at the neck and a navy pant suit, which he thinks probably costs more than his yearly wage, but she is the PM now. Her clothing budget is probably far greater than what it ever has been before. He’d never really paid much attention to the labels on her clothes when his hands used to wander over them, he was always more concerned with getting her out of them. 

It is then that she steps forward and disappears. The door closes and he shakes his head, those days are long gone. He has banished her to the past, and she has done the same to him. 

Protect the principal for the day. That is all he needs to do. 

She is nothing to him now. 

He is nothing to her.

Nothing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... we've got them in the same place, at the same time, thinking the same sort of thoughts. 
> 
> Next, the day at the Corinthia begins...


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Why are you so hesitant to divulge your relationship status?” Kim questions. “You’re the PM, not a nun. Plenty of Prime Ministers have dated and run the country. They’ve had many affairs as well,” Kim explains, a brow raising as she tilts her head to the side before she continues. 
> 
> “He’s single, you’re single. He’s uncomplicated, kind, handsome and he has a beautiful French accent. He’s the perfect partner for you,” Kim adds with another laugh, this time slightly louder in volume. 
> 
> Julia considers Kim’s point for a moment. Why is she so hesitant? She raises her hand to run her fingers through her hair, as she does when she is thinking. Her head raises, and she can feel someone watching her. The feeling isn’t new, of course. There are always people watching her. 
> 
> But despite her protests to the contrary, he is still not just a person. 
> 
> And then there is the answer to her question. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the continued support of this story of mine!
> 
> Thanks to Ally for being my beta as always! Huge hugs!
> 
> We definitely move the story along here and events start to happen! 
> 
> You are allowed to yell at me ;)

Julia smiles brightly as she holds her hand out toward the Prime Minister of Grenada. He returns her smile, and nods his head at her before he begins to leave the room. His assistant, Mr. Jones, also reaches for her hand. 

“Thank you for listening to our concerns, Prime Minister. It was lovely to meet you,” Mr. Jones says brightly, his eyes sparkling toward her, as he bows his head politely. 

Julia nods, and her stomach flutters. She is still not used to being called the PM. Sometimes it doesn't feel quite real, but when she has meetings like the one she has just had, all of the sacrifices she made, and all the danger she has been in, both past and present, is all worth it. 

“Thank you,” Julia replies, politely smiling back. “Safe journey home to you both.” 

“Prime Minister, Mr. Jones, if you’ll follow me?” Veronica questions as she stands from her seat in the corner of the large room and gestures the two men toward the exit. They both follow her and Veronica turns to Julia as she leaves, flashing her a smile. 

Veronica leaves the door to the meeting room ajar as she and the representatives from Grenada disappear from Julia’s line of sight. 

Julia takes a small breath as she shuffles the papers in front of her. Her next meeting is a phone conference with the Prime Minister of Australia and his head of intelligence. She stretches her arms above her head and then removes her blazer, taking her private cellphone from her pocket and placing it beside her. The meeting from Canberra is not scheduled to commence for another half an hour; there is always the delicate balance of time zones when the other side of the world is in communication. 

There is one new message on her phone. She reads the sender and opens the message, wondering what he has to say to her now. **Can we talk tonight? Can I come to dinner?** Julia scoffs and rolls her eyes, catching Kim’s attention, who has been standing near the doorway. 

“Today is going well,” Kim replies with a slight smile and Julia is grateful for the subtlety of her head of security. 

“At least one thing is going well,” Julia smirks as she taps her fingers on the table. Each one of her fingernails clicking on the smooth surface. 

“I didn’t know he was going to be here,” Kim says lowly as she tilts her head backwards to where Julia assumes David is still standing. “I was expecting Tom and Peter.” 

“It’s fine,” Julia says reassuringly. “I had forgotten he was even out there,” she lied.

Julia hadn’t forgotten about David’s presence at all. Kim still didn't know the full story behind David’s departure from her protection detail and for the moment, Julia would prefer it to stay that way. She had, perhaps, always expected at some point she would fill Kim in on what had happened between her and David. But instead Kim only knew the story that had been agreed to by Sampson and herself. Julia expects it helped that quite soon after David’s departure from her detail, plans were put into motion for her to take over leadership of the party and therefore the country. Whatever had occurred in the month before St. Matthews had faded into unimportance... or so she thought. 

Julia sighs as she smiles at Kim once more. She had also been expecting Tom. Both he and Kim had been her constant companions over the last few months, the same way they had been since one cloudy November morning. 

_The bathroom door slams behind her, and she jumps slightly. She does that now with loud noises. She’s easily startled since that damn day at Thornton Circus. She was even the one who made the door slam; it was her fingers that pulled the door shut behind her, and she should have known the noise was coming. But still she is startled, just like earlier today when the egg cracked against the wall outside St. Matthews._

_St. Matthews._

_Where someone had attempted to kill her again, but blessedly failed. Her heart races, her fingers shake, and she holds back her emotions as well as she can. She waits, holding her breath, until she hears the adjoining door to her suite close behind him. She would be damned if she would break down with him still in her room._

_Her hands fly to her mouth, and her thumb traces her lips as she holds all of her feelings inside. She hears the click of the door, and he is gone. She cracks almost immediately. A sob strangles her throat, and a sound that is half human, half animal escapes her lips as she cries as if she has been wounded. But then, she supposes she has been. She leans back against the bathroom door and sinks to the floor, and she cries as if she is back on the floor of her shower after Terry’s murder._

_They still want her dead. She is still in danger and the one person ... who she thought she could trust more than anything... He was the first person she had trusted in a long time._

_David, her David._

_She scoffs at her stupidity. She should have known better._

_He wasn’t hers at all._

_He had been spying, worse still, he knew the gunman who had attempted to take her life. She now knows the name of the man who tried to kill her. She doesn’t know if that makes her feel better or worse. She doesn't know if she preferred to think of him as some shadowy mystery figure or if it’s better to know. Her head falls into her hands and she cries until her voice is hoarse. She loses track of how much time she spends like this, but when she finally rises to her feet, they are numb. Just like the rest of her._

_Her fingers still shake as she leaves the bathroom. Her suite is too quiet, eerily so. Eventually she is able to make two phone calls, the first to Anne Sampson and the second to housekeeping. To the kind voice of the head housekeeper, she requests for someone to come immediately to change her sheets. She would be damned if she ever slept in a bed that smelt like David Budd again. Her request is completed promptly and all traces of him are removed from her room._

_To the somewhat stunned Commander Sampson, Julia requests a meeting tomorrow morning at the Home Office, and before that, even though Julia is well aware that PPOs are not Anne’s department, she requires PS Budd to be removed from her detail immediately. Julia does not allow the other woman time to reply as she cuts the conversation short and turns her phone to silent._

_She crosses her arms over her chest, holding her still racing heart as she steps closer to her freshly made bed. She falls on top of the duvet, her head sinking into the pillow. It smells of nothing; there is no scent. Not of her, not of him, and certainly not of them. Another sob escapes her lips, followed by a tear and then another one._

They never replaced David in the adjoining room. The next day while she met with Anne, the hotel staff locked the adjoining door permanently, never to be opened by her again. 

When she woke the next morning from a fitful and dream filled slumber, both Kim and Tom were outside her door. 

David had been gone and she hadn’t cried because of him since. She has, however, wondered about her reaction to his news, how he had told her the truth and she had attacked him. She had been quick to remind him that he was perhaps the most dangerous threat to her life. She wonders, if perhaps she would have reacted differently should his news not have come on the back of another attempt on her life. Would she have listened more to what he had to say? Would she have thrown him out like she had done? 

_No, the past is the past, it does her no good thinking about it._

“As long as you are okay?” Kim asks with concern as her voice interrupts Julia’s thoughts. 

Julia nods as she checks the time on her phone. She still has a few minutes until her conference call is to begin and she and Kim are alone. It wouldn’t hurt for her to vent for a few moments. But it isn’t David she wants to speak about, not now. 

“I’m fine,” Julia reassures her PPO, before she lowers her voice and questions. “I don’t suppose you have any bright ideas as to how I can hold Jack back from his determination to make our relationship public?” 

Kim chuckles softly. “No,” she admits, shaking her head. ‘I don’t have any great ideas. But I do have one question?”

“Hmm?” Julia mumbles as the blonde opposite her smiles. 

“Why are you so hesitant to divulge your relationship status?” Kim questions. “You’re the PM, not a nun. Plenty of Prime Ministers have _dated_ and _run_ the country. They’ve had many affairs as well,” Kim explains, a brow raising as she tilts her head to the side before she continues. 

“He’s single, you’re single. He’s uncomplicated, kind, handsome and he has a beautiful French accent. He’s the perfect partner for you,” Kim adds with another laugh, this time slightly louder in volume. 

Julia considers Kim’s point for a moment. _Why_ is _she so hesitant?_ She raises her hand to run her fingers through her hair, as she does when she is thinking. Her head raises, and she can feel someone watching her. The feeling isn’t new, of course. There are always people watching her. 

But despite her protests to the contrary, he is still not _just_ a person. 

And then there is the answer to her question. 

The deep blue eyes stare at her for the first time in months as their eyes meet, and for a brief moment, neither of them look away. 

_Shit._

David shuffles on the spot, stretching his neck from side to side and wriggling his fingers. He has been in the same position for at least the last hour and a half. The morning seems to have been fine. Julia has had at least two different meetings, perhaps more. He had been able to hear her voice a few times and he had needed to suppress a laugh. It seems he can still tell by the tone of her voice how the meetings had progressed. 

He nods as Veronica leaves the room. She is farewelling a PM from a Caribbean country that David is sure he heard mentioned as Grenada. The two men follow Veronica, happily chatting quickly to one another, as both of them seem impressed with how their audience with her has gone. 

_She always was perfect on the outside._

He turns his attention back to the hallway and cross-checks to make sure nothing appears out of the ordinary. He half wonders who her next meeting is to be with. Veronica has not returned with anyone else, so he stares back toward the open meeting room door. Kim is still standing there, but this time, as he looks past her and into the large space, he can just see where Julia is sitting and he finds himself staring at her once again.

She has removed her blazer, and notices it is now hanging on the back of her chair. One of her hands is outstretched in front of her, and she is slowly drumming her fingers against the wooden surface of the table. He can only see one side of her face and as he allows himself another moment to take in her all too familiar features, she raises her hand then to run her fingers through her hair, twirling one of the long strands around her index finger, before tucking it carefully back behind her ear.

He can hear that she and Kim are talking, but the topic of their conversation is too quiet for him to assess. He and Kim have exchanged a few cursory smiles throughout the morning; they have yet to speak. But he thinks Kim is pleased to see him, even if her boss clearly is not. He hears Kim laugh and before he can turn away, Julia’s head begins to turn in his direction. 

He tries to divert his gaze, determined that their eyes will not meet. He, however, is not fast enough and for the briefest of seconds their eyes lock, blue meeting hazel once again. She fixes him with a look, and her eyes narrow as she stares hard at him. He is sure he can feel a shiver run down his spine, almost as if she is looking through him instead of at him. He wonders if she is challenging him, to see if he will look away from her first. He holds back a smirk. She knows he’s here, she had noticed him earlier and she had ignored him just as he had ignored her. 

Her hazel eyes are trained on him and he has to look away first. He averts his eyes downward as he curses inwardly. She knows he had been staring at her, she had caught him, and there was no way to pretend she hadn’t. But yet, he still couldn’t determine what emotion her look had been trying to convey. His eyes now return to stare at the end of the hall once more, and he takes one step backward slowly and shakes his head. He stands still then for a few moments, before he checks his watch again. Surely, he only has a few more hours of this before he can leave and he would not have to see Julia Montague for another extended period of time. 

He chuckles to himself then, correcting his thoughts. Of course he would see her. He saw her all the time: the news is full of rolling coverage of her and her movements. There is no escaping her, she is the Prime Minister, and she is everywhere. But at least he wouldn’t need to be in the same vicinity as her, within staring distance, within reaching distance, once today is over. 

Veronica returns to the hallway now. She is alone and David is perplexed for a moment. Perhaps there is a break between meetings, but neither Kim or Julia seem to be moving to leave the meeting room. The young woman ducks her head and smiles warmly as she moves beside him and back to her boss. David gives her a small smile in return and then turns his attention back to the task at hand and listens carefully to the chatter on the radio. 

Everything appears to be under control.

Julia looks back down towards her papers, David had broken their look first. It had been his eyes that had diverted to the side. But, had he not broken the look when he did, she knows she would have. They both knew that the other was close at hand. They both had realised that there had been an element of pretending the other did not exist. That pretence is over. Before Julia can spend any more time trying to dissect how she feels about this, Veronica enters the room with a bright smile, closing the door softly behind her. She turns to Kim and asks cheekily, “Who’s the new guy?”

“Sergeant David Budd,” Kim answers quickly. 

“Mmm… Sergeant David Budd,” Veronica repeats, a small smile plays across her lips as she continues. “We couldn’t keep him around?” she adds with a shrug of her shoulders. “No offence, Kim, but he’s nicer to look at.” 

Kim does not reply and silence hangs awkwardly in the air for just a moment. Julia bites back a cutting remark, as she raises her eyes to stare pointedly at Veronica. 

This is the first time in the few months that Veronica has been her private secretary that she has been anything less than professional. It seems that being in David’s presence can do that to a person. Julia knows better than most. The smile disappears from Veronica’s lips quickly, and the young woman opens her mouth to offer protest or an apology, though Julia is unsure of which. But she hesitates a moment before speaking. Julia can see Kim shake her head in her peripheral vision and Julia decides to ignore Veronica’s observations of David. 

_It isn’t like she is lying._

“I will go down to the kitchen for your lunch request, ma’am?” Veronica asks, her hands interlocking as her posture straightens, a half-hearted attempt to try and pretend she hadn’t said what she just had. Julia nods towards her. “I will order the usual. An hour?” Veronica asks and then with a simple nod of her head, she begins to turn towards the doorway, waiting for Julia’s response.

“That will be fine,” Julia answers, her tone slightly clipped. But professional, nonetheless. Veronica deserves another chance. To punish someone for their reaction to David, well, that would be most hypocritical. 

“Should I be offended?” Kim chuckles, lightening the mood as Veronica disappears from the room, leaving the door open behind her. Kim and Julia are alone once more. 

Julia shakes her head and wrinkles her nose in Kim’s direction as Kim shrugs her shoulders and then returns to her place beside the still opened door. Julia has a few minutes before the computer in front of her will begin to ring. She tucks her private phone into her internal pocket. Replying to Jack will have to wait until the break between her next meetings. She closes her eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath, breathing in through her nose. She needs to clear out the external noise. Today is still an important day. Her next meeting is crucial, as she desperately needs the help of her ally on the other side of the world. 

She lets out her breath, and then reaches behind her, shuffling her arms back into the sleeves of her blazer and adjusting the bow on her collar. She hopes it is sitting straight. Finally, she tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear and then moves her attention to the file in front of her marked ‘Australia.’ An official visit there might be a good idea. It is a different season there, and it is a long way away. The other side of the world, in fact. This is indeed one large bonus. Maybe this is something to consider in the coming months. But not now. This meeting is about intelligence and data sharing and she remembers suddenly, something about manufacturing. 

_Got to keep Martin happy._

Julia stares down at the first document, skimming the words quickly. She finds a notation made by Veronica, a large circle with a M inside. Julia nods her head, taking particular note of the notation. Comments about David aside, Veronica is well prepared for today. She studies the paragraph intently, until she hears a sound that makes her flinch. 

The distinct sound of a gun being fired. Once, twice, and then the sound comes with rapid fire and she can no longer count. There are too many. 

Bullets striking targets. 

Julia’s fingers tremble. She tries not to scream as she clenches her fists tightly. 

A sound she could not forget, even if she tried. 

She is in danger. Again. 

Attempt number three. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He thinks he’s imagined them at first, the all too familiar sounds of gunfire, popping and ricocheting against glass, bullets embedding themselves into walls. Time seems to slow for a moment and he can feel his heart vibrating in his chest as his panic threatens to overwhelm him. He clenches his hands into fists, bringing himself back to the present. He breathes in through his nose and then as he exhales, he scans the hallway. There is no sign that the building has been breached. Then he hears the screams, two of them, one distinctly female, the sound of their fear echoing toward him. 
> 
> Another attack… Julia. She is in danger once more. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the interlude between this chapter and the last. I promise this one does not have such a cliffhanger to leave you all on. 
> 
> Thank you to you all for your continued support and to Ally for being my second pair of eyes! 
> 
> I *think* I have most of the next chapter done. I hope to write more in the next few days!

David smiles as Veronica disappears from the meeting room once more. Julia’s secretary is shaking her head, and looking down at the floor as she leaves the hallway. She doesn’t look at him this time. Instead, she checks her watch and then moves towards the lift, pressing the button and then disappearing. 

The hallway is quiet again and he shuffles his feet. He doesn’t stare back toward Julia. He keeps his eyes fixed firmly forward. The hotel is mostly silent, until all of a sudden he hears a sound he wasn’t expecting. Immediately all of his senses are on edge, his Army and police training kicking in. 

He thinks he’s imagined them at first, the all too familiar sounds of gunfire, popping and ricocheting against glass, bullets embedding themselves into walls. Time seems to slow for a moment and he can feel his heart vibrating in his chest as his panic threatens to overwhelm him. He clenches his hands into fists, bringing himself back to the present. He breathes in through his nose and then as he exhales, he scans the hallway. There is no sign that the building has been breached. Then he hears the screams, two of them, one distinctly female, the sound of their fear echoing toward him. 

Another attack… _Julia._ She is in danger once more. 

A piercing shriek reverberates down the hall as he hears Kim’s voice, both through his earpiece and then when she stares at him. Her expression toward him is one of her needing his help, and he does not hesitate. 

“Control. Sierra Zulu Four Six, Status Zero, Corintha Hotel. Control. Sierra Zulu Four Six, Status Zero, Corinthia Hotel. Lavender is T.A,” Kim announces quickly. Her voice sounds somewhat surprised, but by the end of her announcement her voice sounds more normal again. 

A cacophony of voices immediately start replying to Kim in his ear, but he barely registers what they are saying. It is as if his body moves without him even thinking about what he is doing. His instinct kicks in, and all of his senses are in overdrive. He has to protect Julia. He needs to get her to safety. He cannot let anything happen to her, not on his watch. 

He is inside the meeting room before he even considers how she will react to him being with her in another dangerous moment, and before he considers the consequences of him coming to her rescue again.

Julia is on her feet, both of her arms wrapped across her chest, holding each of her shoulders. He doesn’t miss the slight tremble of her fingers. Without meaning to, he meets her gaze and this time instead of fury, he sees panic and worry, and he realises he prefers the look of anger, compared to this alternative.

Kim reaches out toward Julia and places an open palm on one of her crossed arms. “Ma’am,” she says reassuringly. “You need to come with me,” David is not sure how Kim manages to stay so calm, her voice has barely wavered, but as she makes eye contact with him over Julia’s left shoulder, he knows Kim is expecting him to follow. 

Kim pauses in the doorway between the meeting room and hallway, she has unholstered her weapon and is holding it out in front of her. David follows suit, drawing his glock and copying Kim’s stance. His hand doesn’t tremble as much as it has in the past; his therapy must be working. Kim steps forward, motioning for the two of them to follow, Julia moves behind Kim first and then David follows, Julia’s hands are at her side now. They reach the end of the hallway, just as another large bang permeates their senses, the gunfire is getting closer. Julia jumps at the sound, and she clenches her hands into fists. David can see she is startled, and he wants to reach out for her. He wants to interlock his fingers with hers, to reassure her. But he stops himself. This isn’t six months ago. He isn’t her PPO. He is here as backup, a one-day-only additional support role. This is all today was meant to be. 

Whatever they were is long over. He just needs to get her to safety and then he can leave. He’s nothing to her, just someone she used to know. Based on the way she had looked through him earlier, she had made her feelings abundantly clear. Then there is another shriek, followed by more gunfire and the sound of heavy footsteps and David turns to look behind him as Kim stops suddenly in front of a green door marked Fire Escape. 

“This will lead us to the basement, ma’am,” Kim says before she continues. “I am going to need to check if it is safe.” 

Julia does not respond and David wonders if she has lost her ability to speak; if this time, the shock of being in danger has brought on a permanent silence. Kim carefully pushes the large door open and motions for the two of them to follow. The three of them enter the stairwell quietly, following as Kim moves quickly down a flight of stairs, before she motions for them to stop and disappears from sight. David is still beside Julia, both of them on the landing, but all of his attention is on the doorway they had just come through. Still Julia does not speak, he can only hear her breathing heavily beside him, her breathing slightly erratic. 

Another round of gunshots pierce the air; the loudest so far, it seems. As he had feared, the attackers are coming closer. Another scream follows and with one hand on his weapon he turns slightly, shifting on his feet as he holds the glock towards the closed door. He holds his other hand back towards her, motioning silently for her to stay behind him. He half expects her to move away from him, but she doesn’t. They both hear another round of bullets being discharged into a nearby wall and before he realises what is happening, her hand seeks out his.

Her palm meets his. Her trembling hand is cold against his skin, and with their fingers interlocking, he can feel the pressure of her pinky finger beside one of his knuckles. Her fingers are grasping his tightly, holding on for dear life. He can feel her hand shaking, and for a moment as he turns his gaze back toward her, her eyes raise to meet his and for just one second, he recognises the woman who is clenching tightly to his hand.

_Julia,_ she is back. 

This is the Julia who giggled with him under white sheets, who asked him about his scars, who willingly traced her fingertips along the darkest parts of him. This is the woman who fell into his arms, she isn’t the Prime Minister, who glares through him and appears to wish that he doesn’t exist.

He wonders if she remembers the many times they’d held hands, if those are memories she has held onto, despite their messy ending. He remembers the first time her hand reached out for him and then he remembers the last. He wonders if they are memories they share, the expression on her face seems to make him think they do. Julia blinks slowly and David can still see the fear in her eyes, he wants to say something, anything, to reassure her, to tell her she is going to be okay. He is here, and he will protect her. He will not let anything bad happen to her. But the words seem unable to leave his lips. It is almost as if he said it all the last time and he doesn’t know if hearing the same words will be of any comfort to her at this moment. 

Then as quickly as her hand found his, she pulls her it away and releases their interlocked fingers, moving as if his touch has scalded her. She shakes her head as she pulls away, and she retreats from him. Julia disappears, and Prime Minister Montague returns. Her eyes narrow and then her gaze leaves his and she moves backward and away from him. As if standing next to him, being protected by him, is worse than the menacing sounds outside the stairwell. 

Suddenly, he feels relieved that he had nothing to say to her; the past is the past, and _they_ are the past. He just needs to get her out of here, remove her to safety, and then put distance between them again. He should have told Williams he couldn’t attend today. He should have made up some excuse. Tension surrounded them when there was nothing wrong, but now it seems the two of them are in the middle of a serious shit storm and as the sound of another round of bullets reverberates, he allows himself a moment to begin to wonder what exactly seems to be happening. 

Kim returns, her face appearing below them. “All clear ma’am,” she announces quietly. Julia moves before Kim has even finished her sentence. Her grey heels move fast down the stairs toward the basement. David notices Julia does not hesitate and she does not turn back to see if he is still following her. It is almost as if what she just did, her hand reaching for his and their interlocking fingers, never happened. He wonders for a moment, does she just assume he will follow her? Perhaps, even though time has passed, she knows he would. 

She is correct though, as he falls in line behind her. He takes a moment to check that they are not being followed. He can hear the sounds of the hotel being breached and the sounds of sirens approaching, but it seems the stairwell is still safe. 

He reaches the bottom of the stairs, his glock still held out in front of him. Kim has wedged the door open and she is now leading Julia to her ministerial vehicle parked out of sight across the large basement. There is no driver inside the car and David watches as Kim reaches into her pocket and unlocks the car. She then hands the keys to David, he looks at her in confusion, but she only shakes her head and gestures toward the driver's seat. 

Julia climbs immediately into the footwell of the backseat, curling her legs beneath her as she shelters in a manner that brings David right back to Thornton Circus. Her hands wrap around her shoulders once more as she attempts to breathe evenly. Kim climbs into the passenger seat as David slips into the seat beside her. He starts the car quickly, as Kim pulls her phone from her pocket and makes a call. 

“Ma’am,” Kim breathes. “Operation Blackbird has begun.” 

David does not know to whom she is speaking to, but he realises the urgency with which he needs to remove Julia from this situation. He reverses from the parking space and begins to navigate his way out into the street, he dodges blue flashing lights and a throng of pedestrians who are running from the building they had just been inside. 

“David,” Kim begins as he turns his head slightly to look at her. “You’ll need to take the next two lefts,” she explains. “Then I’ll tell you where to go next.” 

He nods as the car mounts the pavement for a moment, needing to avoid a speeding police car. He flicks the indicator on and moves onto a side street. “Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” _Blackbird, the subtle phone call, Kim’s relative calm in the face of what he knew as unexpected danger and the fact that she knows where they are headed..._ He had so many questions.

Kim shakes her head and he considers what he wants to say next. He takes a small breath, wondering if he really wants to know the answer to this question. But he asks anyway. A statement more of a question, but the inference is the same. 

“You knew something was going to happen. You were warned about the probability of another attack,” his voice betrays his curiosity as he raises his eyes to check the rear view mirror. He doesn’t mean to meet Julia’s gaze, he hadn’t intended to, but he does. It seems as if she had just happened to take that exact moment to raise her face from staring at the car door and his eyes meet hers again. 

Kim answers first. “We have been aware of chatter,” she carefully explains. “We have been concerned about the Prime Minister’s safety from a number of individuals.” 

David can see that Kim wishes to add more, he turns the car another left and Julia interrupts from her crouched position in the back seat. 

“As you know, P.S. Budd, there are people who do not like me,” she states matter of factly as her head tilts to the side, raising an eyebrow as she continues. “People who would prefer me to disappear.” Her voice sounds like an accusation, as if he knows better than most what it is like to hate her. He flicks his attention back towards the road for a moment, before he stares back at her. She has not changed her expression, and she stares at him as if she expects him to challenge her, as if she is expecting an argument, here and now, in front of Kim. 

“At the end of the road,” Kim cuts in, “take a right at the roundabout.” She gestures towards the side road. “We need to disappear.” 

David nods as he moves the car into the next lane, and he wonders if Kim announced their direction as a way of preventing an obvious argument. He takes one look back in the rear view mirror, expecting to meet Julia’s eyes, but her attention has moved back to the floor of the car. 

He sighs to himself quietly, today is certainly not the day he had been expecting. A day where he had been planning to follow a Prime Minister’s wife has turned into one of unexpected danger and now he and his former-boss-slash-former-lover are needing to disappear from danger together. He shakes his head gently, before he turns to stare at Kim quickly. 

“Right at the roundabout,’ he reiterates, and as Kim nods her head, he moves his attention to the road as they head for... he has no bloody clue where. All he knows is he is now one of two people available to protect the PM from who knows what and, of course, it is not just any PM, it is _her_ and after how they left things between them… _This is going to be interesting._

Julia clasps her hands over her knees as she feels the car speed towards their destination. She is not completely certain of the plans for what happens now. When Kim had approached her this morning with news from Anne, Julia had hoped she would not need to know of the contingencies that had been made. Julia had wished they had all been wrong and today would have simply gone to plan. But alas, she was wrong, and today has turned into exactly what Anne had feared it would be. Her fingers tremble slightly. Too many people are dying, dying because of her. 

_She presses an index finger to her temple, she feels as if her head is in a vice. She had barely slept, awake long before her alarm this morning. Both Kim and Tom had been outside her suite. They had both greeted her like normal and then escorted her to the Home Office with minimum fussing._

_Kim has remained behind and has taken up the usual position watching Julia from outside her glass walls. Julia moves her finger downwards and then clenches her fingers into fists. She has been sitting in her office alone for at least the last two hours. Outside, in the main space, her staff seem to be attempting to bustle about like normal. But she has caught a few of them sneaking looks at her. She usually finds their presence reassuring, but today, her glass box feels too exposed, as if she is on show, being watched, expected to do or say something in particular._

_It feels too much like the day after the attack at Thornton Circus. Just without the unexpected and rather unwise sex with her protective officer the night before. There is another difference, too. After the sniper attack, everyone knew she was in danger. But as of yet, no one else knows of the apparent danger she was in yesterday. However, they all do know that her speech given at St. Matthew’s changed things. She announced her intentions to the world, and now she can only assume her staff must be wondering what is going to happen next. They are not the only ones with questions. She stares down at the three newspapers which lay on her desk. Each of them have run with a similar theme. Her speech yesterday has achieved her desired goal._

**_“We can only change their minds with the right leadership. We’ve not been getting the right leadership.”_ **

**_Montague to challenge for top job? Does she think she can do better? - The Times_ **

**_“Together we can create a fair and equal society.”_ **

**_Home Secretary, does together mean with the Prime Minister? Or without? - The Independent_ **

**_Trouble at the top. Montague and Vosler set for battle. The prize? Number 10. - The Daily Telegraph_ **

_She has read all of the articles more than once and stared at the accompanying images. The one on the front of The Times would have to be her favourite. The photo is in black and white and must have been taken by a photographer backstage. The image is of her silhouette -- she is holding out one of her hands with the teleprompter in front of her. She smiles despite herself and her lack of sleep. This is what she has always wanted, what she has been waiting for. She looks like someone who could be the Prime Minister. Someone who_ should _be the Prime Minister._

_She observes Rob, who is approaching her office door. He has been conspicuous by his absence this morning. She has still had no explanation as to the reason he was missing from St. Matthews yesterday, and why he left one of her most important speeches to the somewhat incapable hands of Tahir, her new aide. She reminds herself to take that up with him at a later time, perhaps tomorrow._

_Rob knocks softly on the door, but instead of waiting for an answer, he simply pushes it open and enters. He smiles at her warmly and then stares at her. She blinks at him, waiting for him to say something. He is the one who has interrupted her, not the other way around._

_Eventually he finds his voice._

_“Julia,” he begins and she holds back a cutting remark. She usually likes her own name, but there is something about the way Rob says it, the saccharinely sweet tone of his voice. She breathes through her nose. Today is not the day to be worrying about Rob. He should be last on her list of grievances. “Commander Sampson is on her way up,” Rob informs her as he crosses his hands in front of him and waits for her to respond to him._

_“Thank you, Rob. I think it’s best, however, if I take this meeting with the Commander alone, away from prying eyes. Please see her to the office down the hall,” Julia explains as Rob blinks like an idiot before he manages to nod and then turns to leave her office. She shakes her head slightly as she folds the papers on her desk neatly before tucking them under her other work._

_She closes her eyes for a moment and again breathes deeply through her nose. She tries to think rationally for a moment. Whatever Anne has to tell her this morning can’t be worse than what she said yesterday. Being told someone had attempted to kill you again is pretty high on the list of the worst things to be told. She stands from her desk and begins to move to her private office with Kim close behind._

_Julia closes the door behind her as she moves to stare at Anne. “Thank you for coming,” she says with a forced smile as she sits opposite her. She interlocks her fingers and leaves them to rest on the table in front of her. “I thought discretion was the order of the day,” Julia begins, “given our discussion yesterday afternoon.”_

_Anne does not immediately reply and Julia feels slightly perturbed for a moment. She observes as Anne reaches down into her bag and pulls out a folder, placing it in front of her. “I wish I had more promising news about yesterday afternoon,” Anne explains as her eyes raise to meet Julia’s gaze. “We have had officers at St. Matthews overnight and they have been unable to chase any leads from there.”_

_“I see,” Julia replies non-committedly. She was very much hoping Anne would have more to tell her than what she had the day before._

_“You should know that my officers intend to stay the course and investigate until they have full knowledge of the facts.”_

_“Thank you, I appreciate that,” Julia replies as she notices another copy of The Times sitting folded in the middle of the large table._

_“We have released the scene back to the college,” Anne explains with a tilt of her head. “I believe we have nothing more to gain by searching there any longer.”_

_“I see,” Julia answers, as she shuffles carefully in her seat._

_Anne purses her lips together._

_“The device is still undergoing forensic testing,” Anne begins and Julia nods slowly. She tries not to think about what the intention of the device was -- for her to no longer be here. “As soon as I have information to share, I will be sure to share it with you,” Anne quips, cutting into Julia’s wandering thoughts._

_“And this information?” Julia questions. “With whom else is it to be shared?”_

_“Only you,” Anne pauses. “And the members of your security detail.” She adds and Julia notices the sight raise of her shoulder at the mention of her private security._

_“I believe that will be best,” Julia agrees._

_At the moment, the less people that know about yesterday’s (almost) attack, the better. The last thing the country needs is the terror threat elevated, and people running scared, overwhelmed by fear. Julia moves her hands to the side and places them down flat on the table. It seems Anne does not have anything further to add, so she begins to rise from her chair._

_“Home Secretary,” Anne states and Julia stops her upward movement. “As you are no doubt aware, your request from last night has been completed.” The other woman explains before she meets Julia’s eyes. Anne’s look is questioning and Julia is determined not to give anything away._

_“I had noticed, yes,” Julia answers nonchalantly. She hopes her voice has not betrayed her. Julia would have to be pretty stupid to not notice the absence of David this morning, both here at the Home Office and then back at the Blackwood, also._

_“May I ask why you requested PS Budd to be removed from your service?” Anne questions and Julia notes the change in the Commander’s voice. She wonders if this is the tone Anne used to use when she was just a low-ranking officer, however many years ago that was._

_“I think you should already know the answer,” Julia answers. Her tone is clipped. There is one difference between the people Anne is used to questioning. They are not Julia, and she is certainly able to hold her own. “It seems as if PS Budd was given the purview to spy on me?” Julia probes and when Anne does not reply immediately Julia continues. “Information was being sought about my private meetings with the security service.”_

_“Your meetings…” Anne repeats, and Julia can tell the other woman is still pretending to have no idea as to what she is referring to._

_“There’s no need to play games here, Anne,” Julia begins as she interlocks her fingers on the smooth surface of the table once again. “I am aware PS Budd was placed in the adjoining room so he would be able to have access to my private meetings and therefore report back to yourself and CSI Craddock,” Julia comments carefully, staring back at Anne with a small smirk on her face._

_“That was his original intention, yes.”_

_Julia notes that the other woman does not look as surprised as she thought she would have been. For a moment, Julia allows a thought about David to cross her mind. Did he tell his superiors he had given away their secrets. Was this his final blow?_

_“Original intention…” she murmurs under her breath._

_“You don’t want to play games. Home Secretary?”_

_“No,” Julia states plainly. She really does not wish to goad Anne, she can feel her head starting to throb once more._

_“Then you should be aware...” Anne pauses and Julia wonders if it is for dramatic effect. “My officers uncovered a recording device during their search of your hotel suite. Under my instruction to bring all items found to me, they did so.”_

_Julia breathes hard._ **_Shit_ ** _. She can only imagine what was recorded from inside the walls of Suite 610._

_“A recording of you and PS Budd -- actually, let’s call him David from now on,” Anne suggests as a small smile plays across her lips. Julia tries to remain calm as she does not react. The Commander continues. “A recording of you and David engaging in inappropriate conduct exists,” Anne adds as she turns to look towards her bag, slipping her hand inside and then pulling out a small listening device, dropping it with a flourish onto the desk beside her._

_Julia still holds back her shock, fixing Anne with a pointed stare._

_“I assume this recording device was not one of yours then?” Julia questions back at the woman opposite her._

_“You are not denying what I heard,” Anne has a grin on her face that would give the cheshire cat a run for his money. Julia has never seen Anne smile so happily and Julia wonders if the woman really dislikes her that much, that she is taking pleasure from this revealed indiscretion._

_“No,” Julia admits. There is no way to deny what the Commander has heard. She doesn’t need the tape to be played for her. She won’t insult her intelligence. If there was a recording device, then it heard what it heard. She’d been caught out. But she’s not going down without a fight._

_“I also recognise you, Commander, are not denying the request for David to spy on me either. It seems we have both engaged in wildly inappropriate behaviour,” Julia suggests, turning the conversation back onto her adversary._

_“I’m sorry, Home Secretary, but you cannot compare what I have done with what you have done,” Anne shakes her head and Julia notices that her wide grin has disappeared, and has been replaced with a look of annoyance._

_“What happened between PS Budd and I is no longer of relevance.”_

_“No longer of relevance?” Anne questions in surprise, shaking her head. “I don’t know, Home Secretary. I can think of a few constituents who would have an issue with you sleeping with your protective officer.”_

_Julia holds back an eye roll. It would not just be her constituents who would find her actions unbecoming. Many in her own party would, too, least of all her ex-husband. He would love that kind of leverage over her. Hypocrites, all of them. She will not give any of them the satisfaction, she will have to fight fire with fire. “You said it yourself,” Julia begins and Anne looks at her expectantly. “PS Budd has been removed from my detail. I have no intention of seeing him again.”_

_Anne seems to be surprised by her response. Julia isn’t sure what she was expecting. Did she expect her to beg for forgiveness? Whatever answer Anne was hoping for, Julia has not been forthcoming. “What would stop me from sending this to the papers?” Anne asks pointedly, before continuing. “Your attempt to supersede the PM would be for nothing.”_

_“The name of the person who tried to kill me at Thornton Circus?” Julia asks, raising one of her shoulders as Anne looks back at her with surprise. “You will have discovered the crucial evidence, and there will be no doubt that the 1/10 investigation will have to be transferred back to you and your officers to solve...” Julia pauses for a moment and she can tell Anne is thinking._

_“And Stephen Hunter-Dunn and your relationship with him?”_

_“Over,” Julia states quickly. “He has provided me with what I needed,” she explains and she knows that whilst it would be good to still have Stephen on her side, alliances have to be renegotiated and she still needs to protect herself._

_“You really are just as calculating, and as dangerous as people think you are,” Anne replies lowly, blinking a few times as she regards Julia carefully._

_Julia bites back a laugh. “As_ **_you_ ** _think I am?” Julia questions and Anne does not respond. Julia takes her silence to mean agreement, She knew the answer before she even asked the question. “I have one condition,” she adds and Anne looks at her puzzledly. “The Budd family is to remain in their safe house until it is determined that they are no longer under threat.”_

_Anne raises one of her eyebrows._

_“And the Budd_ family _is of your concern?” Anne questions with surprise._

_“They are innocent children, Commander Sampson,” Julia explains, allowing herself a second to think of the little faces she had seen once on David’s phone. “They do not deserve to be caught up in something this dangerous,” she pauses for a moment. “Simply because they were on a train with their father.”_

_“And their father?” Anne questions as she glances down at the recorder still in front of her. “What about him?”_

_Julia thinks for a moment. She could have David lose his job, his family, she could ruin his life, if she wanted to. She opens her mouth and then closes it, allowing herself another moment of thought._

_“PS Budd,” she begins to explain as Anne turns her face back to meet Julia’s. “His role in all of this is forgotten.”_

_Anne shakes her head and laughs mirthlessly. “It seems, Home Secretary, that you are getting the better deal here.”_

_Julia scoffs._

_“Commander Sampson, do you not read the papers?” she asks as one of her hands reaches out for the folded newspaper beside her. She unfolds the paper slowly and points to the photo of her, then pauses another beat before continuing. “I am going to be the Prime Minister,” she announces as one fingernail taps the image. “It would be beneficial for_ **_you_ ** _to be on the right side of me,” Julia explains slowly as Anne shakes her head. “I can give you an hour to think things through,” she adds as she once again begins to rise from her seat._

_Anne sighs loudly._

_“The name, Home Secretary,” she murmurs. “What is the name of the man who tried to kill you?”_

_Julia continues to her feet._

_“We have a deal?” she questions as she feels her heart thumping in her ears. Has she managed to get herself out of this mess? Again?_

_Anne nods her head begrudgingly._

_“Yes,” she replies and Julia holds back a small smile._

_“I’m going to need all the copies of the tape, too,” Julia adds, gesturing at the device in front of Anne. She knows she’s pushing her luck now, but she has to at least give it a try._

_“This is the only one,” Anne retorts as she slides the device across the table. Julia has no reason not to believe her, and she moves one of her hands to catch the recorder quickly,_

_Julia smirks as she closes her hand around the recorder, holding tightly to it. The secret of her and David’s dalliances has been protected, and with her reputation intact, she’s left to fight another day._

_Julia takes a small breath in, and she keeps her end of the deal._

_“His name was Andy Apsted.”_

With one lone conversation, Julia’s unholy alliance with Stephen Hunter-Dunn was severed and one more dangerous and powerful alliance was created. 

One between her and Commander Anne Sampson.

Operation Blackbird. 

There had been no denying it, the two women were mutually beneficial to one another. 

Anne and her team closed three cases. 

Julia took control of the country. 

And they had ended up here.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She knows she is safe for now. She is in a heavily fortified car with two of the best protection officers in service. But, she cannot help but wonder about Veronica and the people left behind at the Corinthia. She knew there was extra security there, and when she had snuck a peek as David sped her away from danger, the scene had been flooded with police. She hopes that they are all okay. Too many people have already died because of her, and she cannot bear the idea of any more casualties.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of your continued comments and tweets and messages about this one. You all know how to make a girl smile! Big things are coming your way with this story, we are finally headed to the chapter I've been wanting to write most! It is the one after this one! So far, I have a sentence, so I have a way to go...
> 
> Thanks again to my second pair of eyes, WT, you da best ;)

David has not met her eyes, not for a few moments. The car is silent except for the sound of Kim directing David to their next location. 

Julia doesn’t know how she feels about him being so close to her again. There is a small part of her, when she first heard the bullets start ringing in her ears, that was relieved to know he was close by. She imagines this is the same part of her that reached for his hand in the stairwell. She had done so without even thinking, closing her fingers around his, without engaging her brain whatsoever. It had been a stupid idea, because she knows she still can’t trust the man in the car with her, she never could. And yet… It was the feeling of his hand interlocked within hers when she was in danger that she had craved most. Until she realised how silly that had seemed, and how utterly reckless it was to reach for someone who she had already been burnt by once before. 

She shakes her head. Now is not the time for her to be letting her thoughts wander to such trivial topics. She is in danger. Her meetings today, where her biggest issue was meant to be making sure she asked for enough of what Martin wanted, and then being able to cultivate support for RIPA-18, had turned into something else entirely. Something that involved a hail of bullets once again. 

She knows she is safe for now. She is in a heavily fortified car with two of the best protection officers in service. But, she cannot help but wonder about Veronica and the people left behind at the Corinthia. She knew there was extra security there, and when she had snuck a peek as David sped her away from danger, the scene had been flooded with police. She hopes that they are all okay. Too many people have already died because of her, and she cannot bear the idea of any more casualties. 

She does not completely remember the plans that were put in place should something happen… What would happen to her, had she be needed to be taken away for her own safety. When she first became the PM, she was given briefing after briefing about the protocols to protect her. She listened at the time, and she took thorough notes. 

She almost laughs as she knows where these notes are, tucked carefully in the locked top drawer of her desk. Well, they are unlikely to be able to help her now. Who knows when she will see Number 10 again? It could be days. She allows herself a moment to remember Thornton Circus; it was weeks before she saw her flat again. She had only lived back at her flat for a short time before she moved into Number 10. She does miss her old flat, as she still owns it. She decided against letting anyone else live there and has instead left it empty for the foreseeable future. She had sent Veronica there just the other day to pick up some of her clothes and an old photo album with photos of her and Jack, from when they met many years ago. 

_ The bright sunshine warms her back as she sits uncomfortably on the park bench. She sighs as she takes another bite of her panini, trying to balance it and the large law book at the same time. She’s managed to sneak out of one of her classes for a few moments of solitude. She knows her professor won’t be pleased when she returns, but she just needed some space to breathe.  _

_ She loves being here in Paris, and she’s very glad she listened to the encouragement of her professors at home as she applied to spend six months on an international study program. Her classes are interesting, the legal cases are intriguing, but everything is, of course, in French and while her French is of an excellent standard -- so much so that she even finds herself thinking more and more in French rather than English -- sometimes she needs a few moments to think in English and to just be Julia. Not Julia from London.  _

_ She places her book down beside her and takes another bite of her lunch. She isn’t sure when she will have the chance to eat next. She knows her study group is meeting tonight to discuss a case they are preparing for a mock trial. Julia is the one in charge of the research and she already has almost six pages worth of notes. She stares out at the fountain where two young children are busy chasing one another, and she holds back a laugh as the older boy tries to jump over a chair and then lands in the fountain with a large splash. The younger boy begins to laugh hysterically, as an exasperated woman rushes over to the fountain and pulls the older boy out by the arm.  _

_ Julia shakes her head and returns her attention to her reading. As she tilts her head to the side, she notices there is a young man watching her from a short distance away. She can see that he is smiling at the scene of the children playing just like she has been. Julia tries to divert her eyes before he can notice she has been watching him, too. She curses under her breath as he turns his head, smiles at her and then begins to walk over to where she is sitting.  _

_ Julia crosses her legs protectively as he moves to sit beside her.  _

_ “Comme c'est amusant,” her new _ friend _ says with a chuckle, and Julia nods her head politely. “Jack,” he adds with another wide smile. “My name is Jack.”  _

_ Julia tilts her head to the side and regards him with a puzzled stare. How does he know she is English?  _

_ “You’re Julia Montague, right?”  _

_ Julia is perplexed now. She narrows her eyes and regards him carefully. He is a few years older than her, he has dark brown hair and bright green eyes and he is dressed casually in jeans and a button down polo shirt.  _

_ “Your court partner,” Jack explains quickly. “Paulina,” he adds as Julia stares, she knows who Paulina is. “She’s my girlfriend.” _

_ Julia nods.  _

_ “Oh,” she says with a relieved smile. She doesn’t have a stalker to worry about, as well. “We met a few days ago, didn’t we?” she questions as Jack smiles and nods back at her. “I am so sorry,” she says as she shrugs her shoulders. “Too many legal cases in my brain and I cannot remember faces.”  _

_ “Yes,” Jack replies as he regards her with a smirk. “Paulina is in class now, I believe?” _

_ Julia laughs. _

_ “She is, I should be too,” she admits with a wry smile. “But I just needed a moment to myself.”  _

_ Julia notices Jack blush, a shade of scarlet takes over his cheeks and he begins to move from the seat beside her. _

_ “And I’ve interrupted you!” Jack exclaims. “I am so sorry. Paulina is always telling me that I am too forward.” _

_ Julia shakes her head as she begins to gather up her belongings.  _

_ “You’re fine,” she reassures. “My time is up anyway. I am sure Professor Boucher has noticed I am not in class by now!” Julia adds as she wraps her panini back in a brown paper and tucks it and her book back into her bag, before she stands and throws the bag over her shoulder.  _

_ “Are you coming back to the university?” Julia asks as she notices Jack has not stood from his seat.  _

_ He shakes his head.  _

_ “No more classes for the day,” he says happily. “I will watch the madness here for a little while longer and then head home to wait for Paulina. Please tell her I say hello.”  _

_ “I will,” she responds with a smile. “It was nice to see you again,” she adds as she begins to walk away. She pauses a moment and turns back to speak to Jack. “Next time, I will remember who you are,” she promises with a little wave of her hand.  _

  
  


After their accidental run-in at the fountain, Jack had actually become her friend. She had spent a lot of time with him and Paulina over her final few months in Paris. He and Paulina had eventually married, but had separated and then eventually divorced when they had grown apart. Julia had not seen Jack for many years, until just like he had before, he showed up somewhere unexpectedly again. 

She had been a week into her Prime Ministership and was taking a meeting with the French ambassador, when Jack had arrived as one of his assisting diplomats. It had taken him less than two minutes after the meeting was over for him to ask her out to ‘catch up’. She had invited him back to Number 10 the next afternoon, a location where she could control and keep their meeting private, and she would be safe as well. Kim had run three separate background checks on him before she would even consider Jack being allowed to visit Number 10. He had passed each of them with flying colours. Aside from his broken marriage to Paulina and a few parking tickets, Jack had no skeletons in his closet. Julia had far more. 

It had been lovely to spend time with her old friend once more, and Julia felt herself taken back to a time before Roger, before politics, and before she was  _ the _ Julia Montague. For a time, the beginning of their relationship was wonderful. He made her laugh, just like he did when they were in Paris, and he reminded her of simpler times, too. Until, he had become what he had really always been, too forward, and the cracks had begun to show.

She wonders about him for just a moment and if he knows by now what has happened this morning. She is sure he would have heard by now. The whole world probably knows that her country is under attack again. She remembers Jack’s last text message about his desire to come to dinner. She scoffs to herself, no one will be having dinner with her now. Her country is in disarray, and she is being secreted off to protective safety in an unknown location. 

Kim hears Julia’s scoff and then turns her head to look back at her. She is still crouched down in the back of the footwell of the car. 

“We are almost there, ma’am,” Kim says reassuringly, as she gestures toward David to take a turn off the main road toward an industrial estate. 

“You can sit up now,” Kim adds, and Julia nods as she begins to move her legs from the position she has been sheltering in. She moves quickly, unwilling to let on that she has forgotten what the next plans are for her protection. But, she is happy to be allowed out of her cramped confines. 

“Thank you,” Julia replies as she stretches her arms upwards and slides into a sitting position. She peers out the window carefully as she attempts to work out exactly where they are. There is nothing distinctly recognisable about the scenery, but Julia does remember the mention of a safe house, and as they are entering an industrial estate, she presumes they must be making a scheduled stop. She knows she can trust Kim, and as Kim has been giving David the directions to this location, she knows that she is still safe. She allows herself a quick glance at the back of David’s head and for a second, she wonders what he is thinking. 

David observes the scene as he turns the car into an estate and then into a row of storage garages. He’s been driving for about forty minutes. Both he and Kim have removed their earpieces and while he drives, Kim seems to be constantly typing on her phone. David has almost heard a constant vibration from the device since she ended her earlier call with the mysterious voice. 

“The third one on the left,” Kim explains as she points off to one side. “Stop here,” she adds as David slows the car. “You stay here with the PM,” Kim orders, and David nods as she departs the car, leaving him alone with Julia once again. 

He watches as Kim slides one of the garages open. She disappears inside the confined space, and then beckons David to drive the car into the garage. David does as he is instructed, pulling the sleek black ministerial vehicle inside the garage next to a blue Ford Fiesta. David switches the ignition of the car off as Kim closes the garage behind them and then steps up to Julia’s door. David moves to stand beside the car, watching Julia and Kim with interest. Julia appears to look puzzled as Kim gently places a hand on her principal’s left arm. 

“We will change cars here, ma’am. There is a change of clothes and other supplies for you in the boot. David and I,” Kim explains as she moves her gaze to meet his across the garage, “will also exchange phones and radios, and there are additional weapons,” Kim raises a brow and then continues. “Should we require extra security.” 

David notices Julia nod her head and then look toward the car. He stares at the back of her head before explaining. “Company cars, ma’am,” he begins before he pauses. “They have trackers. This one,” he says pointing at the other car, “I assume, does not.” 

Julia turns her head to meet his gaze and she smiles, but it isn’t a real smile. David remembers the difference between a real Julia Montague smile and a fake one. He wonders if he is one of the only people who has seen a real smile from her. 

As he stands there now, staring at her, he can tell this veneer is put on. The difference between the two being that her eyes remain narrowed and only one side of her lips turn upward. 

“Thank you, PS Budd,” she answers him, only speaking to him directly for the second time today. “I am aware of the security protocols,” she adds tersely before she opens the back seat of the new vehicle and climbs into the backseat. David observes as she pulls her seatbelt across her chest and clips it closes before she pulls the door closed. It shuts with a slam that echoes around the enclosed space. 

“We can leave all the tech here,” Kim says as she points David toward a desk in the corner of the garage, distracting him from studying Julia any longer. “You can keep your phone though,” she explains as the two of them move to the desk. 

David copies Kim as they both unclip their radios from their jackets and then their trousers.

“Just take another one, too,” Kim explains as she reaches down into the desk drawer and hands him a new phone. 

David nods as he switches the phone on and then tucks it into his pocket beside his own. 

“You weren’t meant to be here, so I doubt anyone has had time to track yours,” Kim adds sarcastically as she drops her phone and their old radios into the drawer, before she locks it with a key. 

David stares at her blankly for a moment. 

He and Kim had spent a lot of time together over the month that he was in charge of Julia’s security detail. She had even asked him if he’d wanted to have a drink after he had been unceremoniously removed from his old posting. He had declined, not wanting to face questions of how and why he no longer protected the Home Secretary. Kim’s new phone vibrates in her hand and she moves to look at the message quickly. 

“Level with me, Kim,” David says lowly, seizing his chance to ask her what is going on without Julia within earshot. “What the  _ fuck _ is going on here?”

Kim quickly shakes her head. 

“Like I said back in the car,” Kim explains as she turns her head to check on Julia who has not moved from her seated position in the blue car. “We have been concerned about the Prime Minister’s safety. Operation Blackbird is our pre-planned response to this.” 

David returns with a shake of his head. He will not accept half-assed answers now. Especially when it appears that they are all in serious danger. Kim had mentioned additional weapons...

“All this…” David begins, leading the conversation as he gestures around the room, before his voice trails off. “Blackbird, this cannot just be you on your own.” 

Kim smirks, a flash of annoyance crosses her features. 

“It’s not. Sampson is involved, too,” she adds. “She and the principal are very close these days.” 

“The plan is to take the PM to a house near Heathrow,” Kim continues. “It is one of the safehouses owned by the government. They don’t like the idea of a hotel. It has been done before and she needed to be out of central London. From this location, we can have her on a plane at a moment's notice. There are all kinds of plans about protecting a Prime Minister, far more than a Home Secretary,” Kim sighs as she finishes her explanation. She had always hoped she would never have to use these plans, but yet,here they were. 

“And what happens then?” David asks, wondering how long he is now expected to be in the company of just Kim and Julia. “Do we just wait it out with her?” he adds with a shrug of his shoulders, trying to play off his discomfort at the idea. 

Kim sighs, this time with a little more exasperation. 

“We take the principal to the safehouse, and then we await further instructions,” she explains matter-of-factly. 

“Did y’know it would be me to replace Tom today?” David questions with keen interest. He has been wondering the answer to that question since he first saw her appear in the hallway of the Corinthia a few hours ago. 

Kim shakes her head. 

“No idea,” she begins. “I knew he was going out for a curry date,” she adds with a roll of her eyes. “Must have been a good date,” she chuckles. 

David raises one of his shoulders as a slight laugh escapes his lips. “He’s going to owe me for this,” Kim looks at him and David can tell she has more questions. Questions, at this exact moment that he does not wish to answer. “Channel three?” he asks, changing the subject. 

Kim nods as she hands him a new radio and motions him to the passenger side of the car. 

“I’ll drive the rest of the way,” she tells him. “I do know where we are going after all.” 

“Aye,” David replies as he secures the radio and then places the earpiece in his ear. “I’ll get the door,” he suggests and Kim agrees. She joins Julia in the car as David opens the door and Kim begins to reverse from the garage. 

The car pauses for a moment as David locks the PM’s car inside the garage. He wonders briefly if it will be returned to service one day, or if the people who are looking for Julia will find it and destroy it like they did on that fateful day at Thornton Circus. 

He steps back as the door slams with a sense of finality and David climbs into the passenger seat. “Doors and seatbelts,” he says quickly, the words slipping from his lips. 

Kim turns to him and smiles. 

“Once the skip…” she teases, leaving her voice to hang in the air. 

There is no response from the backseat. David lifts his gaze. Julia is much closer to him in this smaller car. Their eyes meet, but this time it is her that looks away first. He catches a look of something he cannot pinpoint before her attention is gone, and she stares out the window. 

“About another twenty minutes, ma’am,” Kim explains as she turns the car back on the motorway and the three of them continue on their journey. 

Julia breathes deeply, still staring out the window as the industrial estate disappears. “Thank you,” she responds softly, and David wants to ask her if she is alright. 

But he doesn’t. Instead he runs his hands over his trouser-clad legs, releasing some of his nervous energy. 

He can do another twenty minutes of silence. It seems like the best idea for all of them. 

  
  


The rest of their drive is mostly uneventful. Julia has to remind herself to breathe as they drive the streets around Heathrow, particularly when an aeroplane is quite low above and she can hear the sound of the low hum above her head. She squeezes her hands together, reminding herself that she knows what the sound is in that precise moment. At this moment, she is not under attack. Right now, she is safe. No one but the two individuals in the car with her, and Commander Sampson, know where she is. 

The car is silent apart from the occasional sound of Kim’s phone vibrating in the cup holder. Julia notices that David moves to look at the phone each time. But he never picks it up, instead he looks at Kim to see if she appears to be bothered and when she is not, he moves his attention to stare back outside of his window. 

Heathrow disappears as Kim exits the main road and begins to drive down a smaller one. Slowly more trees appear and from her position in the backseat of the car, Julia can just make out a small body of water in the distance. She senses David tense at the same time as she does when they pause at the end of a long driveway. There is a beat up white 4WD just beside the gate, and as they stop, a tall, red haired woman climbs from the front seat. Julia sneaks a look at Kim, who does not seem concerned, and Julia feels her worry cease for a moment. 

The young woman, who Julia thinks must be in her late twenties, is accompanied by a large german shepherd. The dog runs in circles around the woman as she unlocks the gate and waves to Kim as they begin to drive down the long, unpaved road. 

“Her name is Kate Booth,” Kim explains as she turns to look back at Julia.

Julia nods her head as the car bounces down over the rocky driveway. 

“And she is?” David questions from the passenger seat. 

“This is her house,” Kim says simply. “Well, it was her father’s. He was a member of the government back in the 1970s. It has always been a safehouse, back as far as the second world war.” 

“She’s been expecting us?” David questions again.

Julia holds back a comment. For a moment, she wonders if he is asking about the other person who has appeared so that he is able to leave and no longer have to share the same space as her. 

Kim nods.

“Kate was also a cop. She had to retire a year ago,” Kim clarifies with a sad smile. “She was shot in the arm in an operation gone wrong. She was one of the best firearms officers. But she was injured and there were complications. She didn’t want a desk job. So she left and she came out here.” 

Julia studies the young woman as the two cars stop beside a red brick cottage. She notices the way one of Kate’s arms hangs beside her body limply and Julia can’t help but wonder what it must be like to have the job you loved, but through no fault of your own, have it taken away from you.

“She and Skyler will have checked the grounds, ma’am. You’ll be safe here,” Kim reassures Julia as she turns the ignition off and begins to climb from the car. 

“Thank you,” Julia responds with a slow nod of her head.

David climbs from the passenger seat and steps to open the door for Julia to exit the car. He doesn’t even really think about what he is doing until he has the door handle in his grasp and he is opening the door. Julia gets out of the back seat and moves to stand beside David. She does not look in his direction, and for a second, it reminds him of the first time he opened the door for her at her flat. How she had refused to look at him and had almost treated him as if he was an inconvenience to her life. They’d gotten past that once, but David isn’t sure they will be able to again, despite the way she had looked at him in the stairwell of the hotel.

“Prime Minister?” Kate questions from opposite the three of them, breaking the silence.

Julia raises her eyes to look in the young woman’s direction. 

“I am sorry to meet you under these circumstances,” Kate begins as she holds her hand towards Julia. “But it is an honour to meet you.” 

“Thank you for letting us come here,” Julia responds as she takes Kate’s hand in her own and shakes it firmly. 

“My father would be happy to know we were still being useful,” Kate says wistfully, before she continues. “I wanted to let you know, everything is set up inside for you, as has been requested.”

“Do you know what the situation is back at the hotel?” Julia questions Kate cautiously, unsure if she truly wants to know the answer, but also knowing that it is her country under attack, and she has to be able to fix it. It is her job. 

“Only what is being reported on the BBC, ma’am.”

“And that is…”

“Three casualties, ma’am,” Kate begins softly. “One member of the public, a hotel receptionist and one police officer who was stationed in the lobby.”

“And the attackers?” David questions from just behind Julia and Kim.

“Four of them. One being taken to hospital, two in custody,” Kate explains before she pauses. 

Julia waits for a beat as realisation crosses her mind. She feels one of her hands begin to shake once again. Three more people are dead because of her and there is still someone out there intent on causing her harm. She is concerned for herself, but she is more concerned about anyone who might end up in their path to get to her. 

“I am sorry, Prime Minister,” Kate adds, cutting into Julia’s thoughts as she attempts to gesture the three of them inside the red brick cottage. 

“The final suspect escaped via the tube, ma’am,” Kim interrupts and shakes her head. “Two officers gave chase, but he disappeared into a crowd.”

Julia turns her head quickly to look at Kim with a pointed stare. 

“Commander Sampson has been keeping me updated, ma’am.”

Julia nods her head. Of course she has been. That makes sense. Part of their agreement was that Anne took additional responsibility for Julia’s security and only a limited amount was delegated to the officer who took over from Craddock. 

“I have set up two secure lines for you,” Kate explains as the four of them enter the small entrance hall of the cottage. “They are both located in the sitting room.”

Kim takes a step forward and checks the rooms swiftly before she turns her head back to look at Julia. 

“Commander Sampson will be online in around ten minutes, ma’am,” Kim begins as she shares the information that Anne has sent to her phone while they were en route to the house. “I also believe the Home Secretary is waiting to speak to you as well. They’ve called a meeting of the National Intelligence as soon as possible. And he wanted to check with you about how you wish to proceed.”

Julia nods her head. She is glad to have something to focus her attention on now. Her incumbent Home Secretary, Dennis Hamilton is good at his job. She had seen fit to not appoint Mike Travis to her former role and instead appointed someone who she had believed to be more suitable. So far, Dennis has done well. Julia begins to step toward the back of the house, following after Kate and Kim.

David watches as the three others move further into the house. He takes a deep breath as he considers his options. He is quite sure that Julia does not require three people by her side as she makes phone calls. Both Kim and Kate seem to have that covered. He remembers the large expanse of land at the front of the cottage and decides he is of better use out there than inside the house. Inside the house, where he is too close to her. He is about to suggest he will be outside when Kim turns to face him.

“PS Budd,” Kim begins. “I think it would be best for you to keep to the outside perimeter.” 

David nods his head. 

“There is a clearly defined pathway around the house,” Kate explains quickly. “You can also see the end of the driveway through the clearing to the left of the house,” she adds, before questioning, “do you want to take Skyler with you?” Kate asks as she gestures to the dog that has remained sitting by the front door. 

“No,” David answers quickly. “I’ll be fine.”

Kate laughs which causes Julia to turn to look at David. Their eyes meet across the hallway. Julia expects David to look away again, but she then realises he expects the same from her. But, it is he who speaks first. 

“Ma’am,” David says simply with a nod of his head and a somewhat blank expression on his face. 

“PS Budd,” Julia replies back to him as he then turns to head back outside. 

Julia watches him leave, carefully trying to suppress the slight sense of relief she feels that David is outside and away from her for the time being. 

_ That has to be it… Right? She’s not actually relieved that he is here? Is she? _

David shuffles past Skyler as he buttons his coat and makes sure that his glock and headpiece are where they are meant to be. 

_ He can do this… He can walk around the perimeter… Stay away from her… But still protect her… It is his job to protect the principal... _


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Ma’am,” she begins quickly, almost breathlessly. “I was just about to call you on this number.”
> 
> Julia tilts her head to the side in confusion before realising that Veronica cannot see her and is waiting for her answer.
> 
> “Is something the matter?” Julia questions quickly, her voice raising at the end of the sentence. 
> 
> “It’s Jack,” Veronica begins with a pause, before she continues. “He’s turned up at Number 10, ma’am, and he is refusing to leave until he speaks with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with some more! 
> 
> Thank you as always for the comments and the yelling! I hope you enjoy this next adventure to the little red brick cottage and are excited about what is next to come ;)

David pauses as he crosses the perimeter fence for the fourth time. He can feel he’s beginning to tire. Being outside for most of the night, alone and on patrol, has reminded him far too much of being back in Helmand. And if it wasn’t for the cool breeze which had been sneaking under his jacket for the last hour, he would truly feel as if he was back there, amongst the dust, the gunfire and the bombs. He lays a hand on his weapon, checking that it is ready to be used at a moment's notice and he continues to lap the red brick cottage.

He can just see the cottage in the distance, and make out that a few lights are on inside the house. For a moment he wonders what is going on in there, and how much of this plan has been thought through. The Prime Minister cannot hide out here forever. It does not work that way. She will not  _ want _ to hide out here forever. 

He remembers, for a moment, the day after Thornton Circus, where only a few short hours after they had slept together for the first time, she was front and centre at a press conference. He allows himself to smile for a moment. He wonders if she is currently summoning the press here to stand and watch her declare her competence at running the country despite what happened at the Corinthia earlier.

He raises a hand to his mouth and yawns softly, before he sighs. He is no longer the young soldier who was once able to stay out on patrol for more than twelve hours at a time. He can feel his back muscles beginning to clench tightly, and he knows that he needs to be completely on top of his game to protect the principal out here. The consequences would be dire otherwise. He would never be allowed to protect anyone else, should he be responsible for someone breaching security and finishing the job that they had attempted to start earlier. 

He moves his hand to his ear and presses on his radio.

“Seven-nine to four-six,” he begins as the radio crackles in his ear. 

“Go ahead, David,” Kim says clearly, almost sounding as if she is right next to him. David isn’t surprised. These new radios appear to be far better than the ones he is used to using. 

“I’m coming up on the house,” David explains as he continues to follow the well-worn path back toward the cottage. “Wonderin’ if we can exchange for a few.” 

David hears Kim chuckle in his ear. 

“Of course,” she replies quickly, her tone light. “I thought you woulda called ages ago.” 

David shakes his head and not for the first time today, wonders exactly what Kim knows about himself and the Prime Minister. 

“I’ll meet you halfway between the path and the perimeter fence,” Kim suggests with a more serious tone. “Can’t be too careful out there,” she reminds him. 

“Received,” David states as he tightens his grip around his weapon, turning his head to check behind him for danger. When he finds none, he begins to head back to the location where Kim suggested they meet. 

Soon enough, he sees Kim begin to approach their meeting point. David observes her striding confidently out of the house before he smirks at her failed concealment of a yawn. They meet in the middle of the path and David hands Kim the flashlight he has used for most of the night. He sneaks a look up into the sky and observes that the sun is beginning to rise slowly. 

Kim takes the flashlight from David’s fingers. 

“Thanks,” she replies with a small but tired smile. “The PM is in the sitting room. Last time I checked, she was still awake… she hasn’t slept at all.” Kim explains matter of factly.

David nods and decides he will do his best to avoid the sitting room then. There must be another room in that large house where he can have a moment to recharge and not run the risk of catching the ire of the PM. 

“Watch out for Skyler in the front room,” Kim adds with a laugh as she steps past David and makes her way toward the perimeter fence. “She and Kate are asleep in there.” 

“Aye, great. Thanks,” David replies as he watches Kim disappear into the half darkness before he turns on his heel and heads toward the cottage. 

Julia sits cross legged on the large sofa. She has changed into some of the emergency clothes that had been packed into a small suitcase in the back of the car they had transferred into at the garage. She had taken her first two meetings with Anne dressed in the clothes she had chosen this morning, and then when she realised there was little chance of her returning to Number 10, she had taken advantage of the change of clothes. She had smirked at herself when she cast a gaze over the outfits she had chosen to pack. 

In the first week she was sworn in as PM, she had been given no end of random tasks to complete. There was her first meeting with the Queen, of course, an equally thrilling and terrifying opportunity; her first speech made as PM; and then there were other not-so-public tasks she had needed to complete. There was briefing after briefing of security protocols, introductions to new staff, learning the ins and outs of Number 10, and then, finally, there were the meetings where she made the decisions she hoped she would never have to follow. Choosing the clothes she would need to wear if something dangerous happened was one of them. 

She remembered going upstairs and staring at the clothes in her closet. They had only all just been unpacked and placed in their new location. She wonders now if she had chosen correctly. Three outfits, two matching pantsuits, one all black with a small white trim around the pockets, one in a grey and white check, and two blouses, one grey and one navy, and the outfit she finds herself in now. A pair of black fitted leggings and a white cashmere jumper. At the time, she had thought herself mad to consider packing what she felt was a very non-PM like outfit choice, but her advisers had been certain that every PM before her had had one, so therefore she should as well. 

As she brushes her palms over her knees, she finds herself grateful for their certainty. She takes a small breath inward. Julia has been staring at the television for what seems like hours now. The story remains the same one, about her, of course. And about all that occurred at the Corinthia almost 24 hours ago now. She raises her hand to brush a stray piece of hair from her face and notices that her fingers are still trembling slightly. She has managed to keep herself from falling to pieces while Kim and Kate have been around, and the two women have been in and out of the sitting room for most of the time that they have all been here. 

Kim has had updates on a half-hourly basis from Anne -- there is still no sign of the attacker that escaped, and the others are refusing to say anything at all. Julia sighs. That was, of course, to be expected. To pull off what they had today, they would have had to complete a lot of preplanning, including a plan as to what would happen should they be caught. If Julia is honest, that is what scares her most. The idea that perhaps all of this is not over yet. The last time she had been attacked, at Thornton Circus, that had been followed up with the attempted attack at St. Matthews. Julia knows she’s lucky to be alive, least of all to be the Prime Minister. 

Kate has been in and out of the sitting room, bringing different meals of increasing complexity. When they had first arrived, there had been an afternoon tea. Julia had picked at it until it had been replaced with a dinner which Julia had barely touched. Then an hour ago, Kate had brought in a variety of breakfast dishes, all of them sitting on the small table in front of Julia, and while they look delicious, she cannot bring herself to eat anything. 

Kate had told Julia that cooking was her way of trying to control something that seemed uncontrollable. She had taken up reading recipe books when she was convalescing from her injury, something to convince herself that while the life she had known was over, there was still something she could devote her new life to. Julia admires Kate’s determination, but she doesn’t know if she would be able to do the same. 

The computer screen in front of her and just to the left of the breakfast dishes is silent. Julia is not currently connected to any video conferences, even if it is just for a few blissful moments. She had finally heard from Veronica for the first time since the incident a few hours ago. Her private secretary was unharmed. When the bullets had rained down upon the hotel, she had just reached the kitchen and she had been able to take shelter there with the chef and  maître d' until it had been announced that it was safe for them all to leave. Veronica had then made her way back to Number 10, and had locked herself in the office using the computer on Julia’s desk to make contact with her boss through official channels. The first time Julia had spoken to her, she had managed to convince Veronica to go upstairs to the private residence and at least shower and change her clothes before she got back to work. It was something Julia never did, to allow someone who worked for her to use the facilities of the private residence, but if there is one thing that Julia knows, it is how a near death experience makes you feel. And how sometimes you just need a few moments alone in shower cubicle to let your true feelings out. 

The next three times Julia had spoken to Veronica, her secretary had sounded slightly calmer. More in control and more able to relay the messages that Julia so desperately needed her to. Veronica was able to hold back Roger from chewing Julia’s ear off with the suggestion that he liaise between the police service and the rest of Cabinet in regards to what statements everyone is allowed to make. It is a task that Veronica herself would have been able to complete, but at least it leaves Roger occupied. Julia does not need the added complication of him involved in all of this, as well. 

The next call she is expecting is a call from Martin in approximately an hour. He, too, has been keeping her updated with the discussions before and after the video conferences have linked her into the room. Martin informed her that he, like the rest of the party is behind the decision for her to be whisked away to protective security, they understand the intricacies of what is happening and what the alternative would mean. However, on the last phone call he had warned her of a growing backlash from the opposition. Around midnight, it had been suggested online that had someone else been attacked at the Corinthia, they would not have fled the scene like Julia had done, and that it was important for the people of the UK to see their leader as someone who stood up against terrorists, not just disappeared. Julia had scoffed at the idea, knowing that she had only followed protocols agreed upon by her own Cabinet. But, when the Leader of the Opposition had liked a tweet in support of the backlash, the story had begun to gain traction. 

Just as she was thinking of him, she hears a familiar voice begin speaking on the television screen. She raises her head to glare at the large screen as Benjamin Myers, Leader of the Opposition, is being interviewed. The interview has been recorded live and her opponent appears bleary eyed and frustrated. She notices him stifle a yawn, lifting one of his large hands to cover his face. He is a tall and slender man with a mop of curly, almost completely grey hair and Julia can always tell when he is becoming annoyed because the curls seem to bounce up and down upon his head. She remembers him being elected for the first time, but she has never really liked him, even before the two of them had battled across Parliament on a regular basis. 

“Where is our beloved Prime Minister?” Benjamin complains from outside his house in Camden. “She has been whisked away, and the rest of us have been left to deal with the fall out.”

“And if you were in her shoes?” the interviewer asks. Julia thinks she recognises the voice, but as all of the cameras are trained on Benjamin, she is not quite sure. 

Benjamin chortles, an annoying sound that drives Julia crazy when she hears it across the floor in Parliament. The hearing of it via the television does not dull the annoyance. It almost makes her want to cover her ears and wait until he is finished. 

“Well,” Benjamin begins with a wry smile, laughing at his own joke before he finishes, “her shoes would not fit me.”

Julia rolls her eyes. 

“Cockwomble,” she mutters under her breath. “I’m not even wearing shoes at the moment, and I am still doing a better job than you ever would,” she says toward the screen before she shakes her head and starts to listen again. 

“But,” Benjamin begins, as he preens himself in front of the camera. Julia notices how he raises one of his hands to pat down his curls. ‘“If I was the Prime Minister, I would be in front of the camera and reminding my constituents of how much I love this country and how far I am prepared to go to defend it. Have we even heard if the Prime Minister has contacted the families of those who were killed?” 

Julia shakes her head. She wonders how she is ever going to look at this man without wanting to hit him. She had always wanted to before, but now… using this situation for his own political gain. She breathes deeply through her nose. She has to remember to pick her battles. She knows that she has already spoken to the mother of the receptionist who was killed. Her name was Amanda. She had worked at the Corinthia for the last three years, and she loved her job. Julia had given her sympathies to her mother and had then found herself apologising. Amazingly, Amanda’s mother had refused to accept the apology, telling Julia that unless she pulled the trigger and shot Amanda, Julia was not the one who had anything to be sorry for. 

“We,” Benjamin continues, puffing out his chest and attempting to appear far more important than what he actually is, “need to see Ms. Montague, our Prime Minister, and not only do  _ we _ need to see her, but our enemies do as well. So that they know that the United Kingdom will not stand for this kind of behaviour.” 

Julia reaches out for the remote and mutes the television with a flourish, before she drops the remote next to her on the plush sofa cushions. She closes her eyes for just a moment and attempts to breathe in and out slowly through her nose. She has been awake for most of the night. Both Kim and Kate have attempted to encourage her to sleep, if only for a few hours. But they have remained unsuccessful. Julia knows what she will see if she closes her eyes... crumpled bodies coated in blood. She will hear the sounds of gunshots and piercing screams and she might even be convinced she can taste the metallic tang of blood in the back of her throat. She may wake, screaming herself hoarse, she’s been there before. She cannot sleep while there is a country to run. She interlocks her fingers in front of her. She will have no more of these trembling fingers, no one will make her look weak or feeble.

She reaches into the pocket of her leggings and retrieves her private phone, hoping that Veronica will see that it is a different line to all the other calls recently, and take this as her hint to excuse herself somewhere where she is able to speak freely. They need to come up with a plan. Julia quickly presses one of the three numbers saved in the speed dial and Veronica answers on the second ring.

“Ma’am,” she begins quickly, almost breathlessly. “I was just about to call you on this number.”

Julia tilts her head to the side in confusion before realising that Veronica cannot see her and is waiting for her answer.

“Is something the matter?” Julia questions quickly, her voice raising at the end of the sentence. 

“It’s Jack,” Veronica begins with a pause, before she continues. “He’s turned up at Number 10, ma’am, and he is refusing to leave until he speaks with you.” 

Julia groans loudly as her head falls into her outstretched palm. 

“How many people have seen him?” Julia questions quickly, as she presses an index finger to the side of her temple and presses down softly. This is not what she needs, the added complication of Jack. The next thing she knows, she will have Benjamin complaining that she is more concerned about her boyfriend…  _ Is that what he is?  _ Than what she is about the country. 

“He called your private office number, ma’am,” Veronica explains quickly. “I was alone in the office, and he was just outside the gated area. I sent Stephen to fetch him. It’s only us that know he is here.”

Julia raises her head and lets out a deep breath. Veronica answered the phone. Stephen collected him. She can trust them both. Stephen is responsible for the security of Number 10, he has seen at least four Prime Ministers before her and he can be counted on for discretion. One crisis averted. 

“Where is he in the residence?” Julia asks with a sigh, sorry that while her private secretary should be helping her fix one serious crisis, she is running around after Jack. 

“Upstairs ma’am,” Veronica replies and Julia can hear rustling in the background. “I have left Stephen with him. Do you want to speak with him?” she questions with an attempt to be calm. But Julia can hear her hesitation. 

“Yes,” Julia replies matter of factly. “But, only for five minutes exactly. After five minutes you take the phone away.”

“Five minutes,” Veronica repeats, her voice clear. “I understand, ma’am.”

“And Veronica,” Julia begins, as she pulls herself upright to sit more comfortably. “We need to come up with a plan for Benjamin.”

Julia hears her secretary sigh and the sound of her heels clicking on the Number 10 floor. 

“You’ve seen social media?” Veronica questions with a quiet groan. Julia can hear that Veronica is almost as annoyed by this latest development as she is.

“Not all of it,” Julia admits as she stares upward at the still muted television. “But, I’ve seen the BBC, and that is enough.” 

“I did try to get the tweet removed before it could be seen,” Veronica says with a defeated sigh. “But Benjamin was too fast for me. And the internet never forgets. I am so sorry, ma’am.”

Julia sighs and shakes her head. Benjamin was probably sitting on his phone, just waiting for ammunition to use against her. She knows he often has Twitter open while they are in Parliament. There have been many tweets from him while members of her party are making impassioned speeches in the House. He claims it is “to keep up with what their constituents think,” and Julia will admit that she has done the same from time to time, but she certainly does not sit there aimlessly scrolling. She does have a country to run, despite what Benjamin may suggest about her. 

“It’s happened now,” Julia reminds Veronica. “We cannot change it,” she adds as she sees Benjamin’s face appear on her screen again, a replay of his earlier interview with additional headlines. 

_ Opposition Leader suggests the PM is missing in action, do you agree? Have your say online… _

“We do need a plan though,” Julia reminds Veronica. “Please contact Anne’s office again on my behalf.” 

“Yes ma’am. I’ll do that,” Veronica says with an attempt at confidence and Julia can hear her then knock on a door. “I have arrived upstairs, ma’am. Do you wish to speak with Jack now?” 

Julia shuffles in her seat and crosses her legs, her bare feet resting underneath her legs.

“Yes, you’d better put him on,” Julia replies with a slight groan. “Five minutes though,” she reminds Veronica.

“Yes, Prime Minister,” Veronica declares and Julia can then hear hushed voices and heavy rustling sounds in the background. 

“Ma chérie,” Jack says quickly, and Julia can hear that he is breathing heavily. “Are you alright? I have been so concerned.” 

Julia shakes her head and breathes through her nose. Yelling at Jack is not the correct choice for her to make right now, even though that is exactly what she wants to do. She places her hand that is not holding the phone down beside her and grips the sofa before she takes another small breath and begins to speak as calmly as she can muster.

“You need to calm down,” she says with certainty. “It was not a good idea for you to just show up, Jack. What if someone had seen you?” she questions, wanting to know exactly what he thought he was going to achieve by turning up on her doorstep… well, as close as he could get, anyway. 

“Julia, chérie, what was I meant to do? Just sit on my ‘ands, while you were in danger?” he questions her, his accent far stronger than usual. “I care about you,” he continues.

Julia feels her stomach turn. The idea of Jack caring for her seems to make her feel more unwell with each passing moment, and she does not know why. Once upon a time, Jack would have been everything that she wanted. Not even once upon a time... when they had first gotten back in touch, it had seemed  _ right _ . He seemed like the kind of man that she should date. He was like Roger, minus the wandering eye and with the addition of the French accent. He believed in Conservative Party ideals and she was sure that her constituents and every member of the conservative press pack would be delighted with her choice of someone who they would surely refer to as the First Gentleman… even though the whole idea sounds most ridiculous to Julia. 

But, Julia could never return the words that she cared for Jack back toward him. Sure, she’d slept with him, more than once. Taken him to bed in one of the spare bedrooms of the private residence, pretending it was hers. Her desire to keep her cards close to her chest and her private life private had not waned, even from someone who she was willing to go to bed with. She was happy to have him around, when it suited her, but she wasn’t willing to change her life for him. She was not willing to let him in… she clearly didn’t want him to stand beside her… that was becoming obvious.

“Ma chérie,” Jack says again, this time more insistently. He is still waiting for her to answer him. 

“You should have gone home,” Julia begins clearly. “You should have gone home and waited for me to call.”

Julia hears Jack’s exasperated sigh and she raises an index finger to press against the side of her temple. Her head is beginning to throb more than it was already. 

“And when would this call ‘ave happened?” Jack questions her intently. She can hear that he is becoming frustrated. 

“When I could,” Julia states bluntly before she continues. “Jack, you seem to forget that I am in charge of a country. One that I love, one that I serve. One I am proud to belong to,” Julia replies passionately. “And in case you have forgotten, this country was attacked yesterday, the same as me,” she states, proud of herself for making through that statement without her voice cracking. 

“Of course, I ‘ave not forgotten,'' Jack answers quickly, and Julia can hear him huff with annoyance. “Why do you think I have been so eager to speak to you?” 

Julia sighs softly, this is not what she expected she would be needing to deal with when she woke up yesterday morning. It had all seemed so simple then, crucial meetings to draw support from the nation’s allies, dinner at Number 10 and early to bed last night in preparation for a busy day at Westminster… instead, however, she has this. A cottage in the middle of nowhere, a former PPO-turned lover-turned PPO again just outside, a country in crisis and a ‘boyfriend’ who fails to recognise the importance of discretion at the best of times, least of all now, with all that is going on. 

“Go home, Jack. You need to go home,” she says quietly. “You need to let me figure all of this out, you need to let me **be** the Prime Minister and I  **will** call you when I can,” she adds by way of placating him. 

“You will, really?”

Julia sighs again. 

“Yes,” she states matter of factly, biting back a comment. “Tell Veronica to remind me.” 

“You know, she seems very stressed.” 

Julia frowns. Of course her secretary is stressed. She is about to remind Jack of the  _ many  _ reasons Veronica has to be stressed when she realises that she can only hear rustling in the background again and then Jack speaks. 

“Mademoiselle Veronica, you must remind Julia to call me. Okay?”

Julia rolls her eyes and shakes her head. 

“You know, I did not actually mean for you to tell her that,” Julia replies sarcastically. 

Jack chortles and the sound feels foreign in Julia’s ears, even though she has heard him laugh many times before. 

“Then I will come back, especially since you cannot even tell me where you are,” Jack adds, and Julia can hear the defiance in his voice. 

Julia shakes her head and gives another exasperated sigh. 

“Please, Jack,” she begins as she shuffles her legs underneath her, trying to get herself comfortable. “I know we have been seeing one another but, please, listen to me this time. Of course I cannot tell you where I am.”

“Oui, très bien, I do not like this, but I will agree.. For now,” he replies and Julia feels relief that he has actually agreed to something for once. “It is only because I love you, Julia.” 

Julia does not respond immediately. Her relief at his agreement disappears, as he has never said that to her before. She remembers Paulina telling her how it took Jack months to tell her that he loved her back when they were first dating. This, she and Jack, it’s all moving too quickly, and this is all a distraction. She stares up at the television where the BBC is repeating the same footage of the Corinthia once more and the news ticker along the bottom now reads,  _ ‘PM safe in unknown location – attacker still at large.’  _

She breathes deeply. Surely the five minutes she had requested from Veronica is over now. 

“Jack, I need to speak to Veronica.” 

She can hear Jack sigh, but he only answers her with a simple ‘okay’ and he disappears from the line. 

“Ma’am?” Veronica says by way of greeting. 

“You need to make sure he leaves the residence,” Julia begins, speaking quickly. “Order a car, take him home, make sure he stays there. Hell, post someone on his building to make sure if you have to, we cannot have these kinds of distractions.”

“Yes, ma’am. Right away.” 

“Veronica, I want my politics to speak for themselves. I want people to see how I respond to a crisis. Not be overshadowed by whoever I am seeing in my private time,” Julia adds, ensuring that Veronica is aware of how important this task is. 

“I understand, Prime Minister,” Veronica replies reassuringly. 

“And once he is gone, we need a plan to fix all of this. I cannot have people speaking for me. I need to speak. I need to be seen.” Julia adds as she can hear Veronica’s heels clicking on the Number 10 floor as she imagines she is making her way back down to the office. 

“I will call with an update shortly, Prime Minister.”

“Thank you,” Julia replies and contemplates ending the call. But she remembers Jack’s earlier mention of Veronica’s mood. “Veronica,” she begins, softening in concern. “You are okay?” 

“Yes, ma’am. Of course, ma’am. I am so sorry about earlier. It was unprofessional of me...” Veronica answers quickly and before Julia can reply to tell her that she knows how she feels, her secretary disconnects the call leaving Julia alone with her thoughts as she drops the phone into her lap. 

Julia sighs loudly to herself. She knows she has to do something. She is of no use to anyone hiding away here. She knows it is for her own good. She had agreed on these plans, even though she would loathe to admit it. Her opposition is correct. She needs to be seen. She needs to do something. 

She stares down at her phone in her lap and she contemplates calling Anne herself. She reaches back down for it and begins to raise it, when she hears a rustling in the hallway just outside the door. 

She does not look up from her phone immediately and assumes it is Kim who has come to check on her once again. 

“Kim. Thank goodness,” she begins hurriedly. “I need to leave here. I know it’s not the plan I agreed upon. But plans sometimes need to change. And this needs to be flexible,” Julia adds with a persuasive tone, hoping her PPO will agree with her and that she stands a chance of getting out of this cottage, which is seemingly in the middle of nowhere. 

But there is only silence and Kim does not reply. 

Julia sighs before she raises her gaze, so she can attempt to persuade Kim a little more forcefully. She blinks once, then twice as she realises why Kim has not replied. 

It isn’t Kim who has come to check on her in the sitting room. It isn’t Kim who is staring at her intently, deep blue eyes focusing all their attention on her. 

Instead, it’s him. 

It’s David. 


End file.
